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ARE YOU SEEING ME?

There’s a warm family story amid the didacticism, but the sense that autism must be constantly explained and justified to...

Australian twins Perry, who has a brain condition, and Justine, who is his full-time caregiver, travel together to Vancouver.

Justine and Perry’s mother left when the two were children, and their father died of cancer just before they turned 18. For two years, Justine has served as Perry’s sole caregiver, but after the trip, Perry will move into Fair Go, a residential facility their father chose before his death. Justine and Perry narrate alternating sections, interspersed with short passages from their father’s journal. Between the journal entries, which recount moments from the twins’ childhood, and the canned spiel Justine gives strangers to explain Perry’s “inappropriate” behavior, a large part of the aim here seems to be introducing neurotypical readers to Perry’s condition. The story unfolds with intimacy and affection, shown through the twins’ special nicknames for each other and each sibling’s desire to do right by the other. Perry’s attempts to follow social rules and his enthusiasm for his interests—Jackie Chan, seismology, mythical monsters—are clear in the sections he narrates, but how he feels about essentially being apologized for every time Justine gives her spiel is unfortunately never explored.

There’s a warm family story amid the didacticism, but the sense that autism must be constantly explained and justified to outsiders is discomfiting. (Fiction. 14-18)

Pub Date: Aug. 1, 2015

ISBN: 978-1-4598-1079-2

Page Count: 288

Publisher: Orca

Review Posted Online: May 11, 2015

Kirkus Reviews Issue: June 1, 2015

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IF ONLY I HAD TOLD HER

A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind.

In this companion novel to 2013’s If He Had Been With Me, three characters tell their sides of the story.

Finn’s narrative starts three days before his death. He explores the progress of his unrequited love for best friend Autumn up until the day he finally expresses his feelings. Finn’s story ends with his tragic death, which leaves his close friends devastated, unmoored, and uncertain how to go on. Jack’s section follows, offering a heartbreaking look at what it’s like to live with grief. Jack works to overcome the anger he feels toward Sylvie, the girlfriend Finn was breaking up with when he died, and Autumn, the girl he was preparing to build his life around (but whom Jack believed wasn’t good enough for Finn). But when Jack sees how Autumn’s grief matches his own, it changes their understanding of one another. Autumn’s chapters trace her life without Finn as readers follow her struggles with mental health and balancing love and loss. Those who have read the earlier book will better connect with and feel for these characters, particularly since they’ll have a more well-rounded impression of Finn. The pain and anger is well written, and the novel highlights the most troublesome aspects of young adulthood: overconfidence sprinkled with heavy insecurities, fear-fueled decisions, bad communication, and brash judgments. Characters are cued white.

A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind. (author’s note, content warning) (Fiction. 14-18)

Pub Date: Feb. 6, 2024

ISBN: 9781728276229

Page Count: 416

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

Review Posted Online: Jan. 5, 2024

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 1, 2024

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IF HE HAD BEEN WITH ME

There’s not much plot here, but readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.

The finely drawn characters capture readers’ attention in this debut.

Autumn and Phineas, nicknamed Finny, were born a week apart; their mothers are still best friends. Growing up, Autumn and Finny were like peas in a pod despite their differences: Autumn is “quirky and odd,” while Finny is “sweet and shy and everyone like[s] him.” But in eighth grade, Autumn and Finny stop being friends due to an unexpected kiss. They drift apart and find new friends, but their friendship keeps asserting itself at parties, shared holiday gatherings and random encounters. In the summer after graduation, Autumn and Finny reconnect and are finally ready to be more than friends. But on August 8, everything changes, and Autumn has to rely on all her strength to move on. Autumn’s coming-of-age is sensitively chronicled, with a wide range of experiences and events shaping her character. Even secondary characters are well-rounded, with their own histories and motivations.

There’s not much plot here, but readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.   (Fiction. 14 & up)

Pub Date: April 1, 2013

ISBN: 978-1-4022-7782-5

Page Count: 336

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

Review Posted Online: Feb. 12, 2013

Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2013

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