A comprehensive, insightful guide to interpersonal relations, sometimes hampered by awkward execution.
A down-home guide to playing well with others.
In this new self-help manual, Loomis (How to Improve Your Relationships, Dramatically, 2000) sets out to help readers master the basic skills of social interaction, with anyone from distant acquaintances to close family members. According to the author, we must all “accept the harsh reality of our self-centeredness” and work from the premise that getting others to like us means getting them to like themselves. In bite-size sections tackling subjects such as listening attentively, giving effective compliments and admitting fault, Loomis offers concrete strategies he calls “MakeFeelGoods” for boosting others’ self-esteem. The author admits that much of the material is common-sensical, but the book still serves as an effective reminder of the mechanisms of our interactions with others. Loomis often offers sharp insights, as when he advises readers not to “ask for advice when it’s really support or approval you want” for something you’ve already decided to do. His folksy tone is often self-effacing, and for the most part, his advice is helpful without being condescending; he also uses examples full of colorful characters and dialogue. Sometimes, however, the old-fashioned style veers into territory that may offend some readers; at one point, for example, the book describes modern “street talk” as a “distorted, arguably illogical, murky use of language;” at another, the author writes about traditional chivalric gestures, asserting that “treating women with such courtesies pleases most of them.” Readers may also find a chapter enumerating the failings of customer service employees to be particularly uncomfortable. At the book’s end, the text becomes more than a little self-important: “Almost daily, you should refer to [this book], so you can become proficient in using the skills it teaches….You have to be reminded, reminded, and reminded.” That said, the book as a whole remains a useful outline of how and why to treat others decently.
A comprehensive, insightful guide to interpersonal relations, sometimes hampered by awkward execution.Pub Date: Nov. 21, 2013
ISBN: N/A
Page Count: 262
Publisher: Glenn Publishing
Review Posted Online: Nov. 26, 2013
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
Dogged original research and superb narrative skills come together in this gripping account of pitiless evil.
Greed, depravity, and serial murder in 1920s Oklahoma.
During that time, enrolled members of the Osage Indian nation were among the wealthiest people per capita in the world. The rich oil fields beneath their reservation brought millions of dollars into the tribe annually, distributed to tribal members holding "headrights" that could not be bought or sold but only inherited. This vast wealth attracted the attention of unscrupulous whites who found ways to divert it to themselves by marrying Osage women or by having Osage declared legally incompetent so the whites could fleece them through the administration of their estates. For some, however, these deceptive tactics were not enough, and a plague of violent death—by shooting, poison, orchestrated automobile accident, and bombing—began to decimate the Osage in what they came to call the "Reign of Terror." Corrupt and incompetent law enforcement and judicial systems ensured that the perpetrators were never found or punished until the young J. Edgar Hoover saw cracking these cases as a means of burnishing the reputation of the newly professionalized FBI. Bestselling New Yorker staff writer Grann (The Devil and Sherlock Holmes: Tales of Murder, Madness, and Obsession, 2010, etc.) follows Special Agent Tom White and his assistants as they track the killers of one extended Osage family through a closed local culture of greed, bigotry, and lies in pursuit of protection for the survivors and justice for the dead. But he doesn't stop there; relying almost entirely on primary and unpublished sources, the author goes on to expose a web of conspiracy and corruption that extended far wider than even the FBI ever suspected. This page-turner surges forward with the pacing of a true-crime thriller, elevated by Grann's crisp and evocative prose and enhanced by dozens of period photographs.
Dogged original research and superb narrative skills come together in this gripping account of pitiless evil.Pub Date: April 18, 2017
ISBN: 978-0-385-53424-6
Page Count: 352
Publisher: Doubleday
Review Posted Online: Feb. 1, 2017
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 15, 2017
BOOK TO SCREEN
BOOK TO SCREEN
BOOK TO SCREEN
This moving, potent testament might have been titled “Black Lives Matter.” Or: “An American Tragedy.”
The powerful story of a father’s past and a son’s future.
Atlantic senior writer Coates (The Beautiful Struggle: A Father, Two Sons, and an Unlikely Road to Manhood, 2008) offers this eloquent memoir as a letter to his teenage son, bearing witness to his own experiences and conveying passionate hopes for his son’s life. “I am wounded,” he writes. “I am marked by old codes, which shielded me in one world and then chained me in the next.” Coates grew up in the tough neighborhood of West Baltimore, beaten into obedience by his father. “I was a capable boy, intelligent and well-liked,” he remembers, “but powerfully afraid.” His life changed dramatically at Howard University, where his father taught and from which several siblings graduated. Howard, he writes, “had always been one of the most critical gathering posts for black people.” He calls it The Mecca, and its faculty and his fellow students expanded his horizons, helping him to understand “that the black world was its own thing, more than a photo-negative of the people who believe they are white.” Coates refers repeatedly to whites’ insistence on their exclusive racial identity; he realizes now “that nothing so essentialist as race” divides people, but rather “the actual injury done by people intent on naming us, intent on believing that what they have named matters more than anything we could ever actually do.” After he married, the author’s world widened again in New York, and later in Paris, where he finally felt extricated from white America’s exploitative, consumerist dreams. He came to understand that “race” does not fully explain “the breach between the world and me,” yet race exerts a crucial force, and young blacks like his son are vulnerable and endangered by “majoritarian bandits.” Coates desperately wants his son to be able to live “apart from fear—even apart from me.”
This moving, potent testament might have been titled “Black Lives Matter.” Or: “An American Tragedy.”Pub Date: July 8, 2015
ISBN: 978-0-8129-9354-7
Page Count: 176
Publisher: Spiegel & Grau
Review Posted Online: May 5, 2015
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 2015
BOOK REVIEW
BOOK REVIEW
SEEN & HEARD
BOOK TO SCREEN
BOOK TO SCREEN
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