The challenges are ongoing, and Senator is honest in acknowledging the limits of any insights one might glean from her son's...
A wide-ranging memoir and guide to autism in adulthood.
There is undoubtedly disagreement regarding the terminology used in conversations related to autism. “Person-first” language decreases the tendency toward defining people by their disabilities; thus, "autistic people" becomes "people with autism." Others prefer being called simply "autistic," arguing that they are in fact defined by their autism and should embrace it as a part of their personalities. Senator (The Autism Mom's Survival Guide (for Dads, too!), 2010, etc.) uses both terms, noting the importance of keeping everything on the table as a child moves through adolescence into adulthood. There are numerous books about caring for children with autism, but the resources about adulthood autism are not as common. The decisions become difficult in new ways: should the adult live with parents or in a residential support home? How do you address the feeling of abandonment, that you're essentially handing over control of his well-being to strangers, often underpaid and all too frequently willing to do the bare minimum to avoid losing their jobs? Senator doesn't attempt to completely untangle the laws, guidelines, and treatment options, but she uses her own story—the author’s son, Nat, has autism and has recently reached adulthood—to offer qualitative insights about navigating the social service systems. The author writes openly about a diverse variety of experiences—e.g., entrusting guardianship to a sibling in the case of a parent’s death; the common struggles of adulthood as experienced through the lens of autism; finding the best possible option for a place a child can call his own and doing so in a way that empowers him to be successful when he leaves the care of his parents.
The challenges are ongoing, and Senator is honest in acknowledging the limits of any insights one might glean from her son's story. That acknowledgement, however, serves the book in its shared solidarity, of reaching out to always ask questions. As an emotional resource, her book is excellent.Pub Date: April 5, 2016
ISBN: 978-1-5107-0423-7
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing
Review Posted Online: Feb. 8, 2016
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2016
A vivid sequel that strains credulity.
Fremont (After Long Silence, 1999) continues—and alters—her story of how memories of the Holocaust affected her family.
At the age of 44, the author learned that her father had disowned her, declaring her “predeceased”—or dead in his eyes—in his will. It was his final insult: Her parents had stopped speaking to her after she’d published After Long Silence, which exposed them as Jewish Holocaust survivors who had posed as Catholics in Europe and America in order to hide multilayered secrets. Here, Fremont delves further into her tortured family dynamics and shows how the rift developed. One thread centers on her life after her harrowing childhood: her education at Wellesley and Boston University, the loss of her virginity to a college boyfriend before accepting her lesbianism, her stint with the Peace Corps in Lesotho, and her decades of work as a lawyer in Boston. Another strand involves her fraught relationship with her sister, Lara, and how their difficulties relate to their father, a doctor embittered after years in the Siberian gulag; and their mother, deeply enmeshed with her own sister, Zosia, who had married an Italian count and stayed in Rome to raise a child. Fremont tells these stories with novelistic flair, ending with a surprising theory about why her parents hid their Judaism. Yet she often appears insensitive to the serious problems she says Lara once faced, including suicidal depression. “The whole point of suicide, I thought, was to succeed at it,” she writes. “My sister’s completion rate was pathetic.” Key facts also differ from those in her earlier work. After Long Silence says, for example, that the author grew up “in a small city in the Midwest” while she writes here that she grew up in “upstate New York,” changes Fremont says she made for “consistency” in the new book but that muddy its narrative waters. The discrepancies may not bother readers seeking psychological insights rather than factual accuracy, but others will wonder if this book should have been labeled a fictionalized autobiography rather than a memoir.
A vivid sequel that strains credulity.Pub Date: Feb. 11, 2020
ISBN: 978-1-982113-60-5
Page Count: 352
Publisher: Gallery Books/Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: Oct. 20, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 15, 2019
BOOK REVIEW
A straightforward tale of kindness and paying it forward in 1980s New York.
When advertising executive Schroff answered a child’s request for spare change by inviting him for lunch, she did not expect the encounter to grow into a friendship that would endure into his adulthood. The author recounts how she and Maurice, a promising boy from a drug-addicted family, learned to trust each other. Schroff acknowledges risks—including the possibility of her actions being misconstrued and the tension of crossing socio-economic divides—but does not dwell on the complexities of homelessness or the philosophical problems of altruism. She does not question whether public recognition is beneficial, or whether it is sufficient for the recipient to realize the extent of what has been done. With the assistance of People human-interest writer Tresniowski (Tiger Virtues, 2005, etc.), Schroff adheres to a personal narrative that traces her troubled relationship with her father, her meetings with Maurice and his background, all while avoiding direct parallels, noting that their childhoods differed in severity even if they shared similar emotional voids. With feel-good dramatizations, the story seldom transcends the message that reaching out makes a difference. It is framed in simple terms, from attributing the first meeting to “two people with complicated pasts and fragile dreams” that were “somehow meant to be friends” to the conclusion that love is a driving force. Admirably, Schroff notes that she did not seek a role as a “substitute parent,” and she does not judge Maurice’s mother for her lifestyle. That both main figures experience a few setbacks yet eventually survive is never in question; the story fittingly concludes with an epilogue by Maurice. For readers seeking an uplifting reminder that small gestures matter.
Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2011
ISBN: 978-1-4516-4251-3
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Howard Books/Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: July 26, 2011
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2011
BOOK REVIEW
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