Where I come from, you'd last almost as long as a pork chop at a beggar's convention."" Not an excerpt from ""Toward More Picturesque Speech'"" this is the retort of 5th century Hildegundis to a Gallo-Roman who's called her a ""doxey."" There are many equally jumping moments as two Franks, Hildegundis and her Walter (formerly Attila's prize soldier), flee the ""butter-yellow faced"" Hun who's forbidden their marriage. This, then, is a love story, based on legends (Waldhere, Thidrekssaga of Bern, Waltharii poesis) and reactivated--nay, hyped. Studded with unlikely, inappropriate cliches (dead as a doornail, sober as a judge), the story includes peculiar, peripheral doodads (a waterproof British cloak in 451 A.D.?) and a subplot incorporating the hero Siegfried into the background. As for the action: in a single swipe a horseman's sword arm falls ""one way, his still-grinning head (falls) another, and his body (keeps) its seat."" Attaboy Attila--Frank escape reading.