NOT TONIGHT, DEAR: How to Reawaken Your Sexual Desire by

NOT TONIGHT, DEAR: How to Reawaken Your Sexual Desire

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KIRKUS REVIEW

The title suggests that this is a self-help manual, with step-by-step instructions for those with sexual hang-ups. Not exactly. The book's first half goes on at length about, among other things, the causes of ""desire disorder""--i.e., a low or nonexistent sex drive. The causes can include depression, unrealistic expectations of perpetual sexual bliss, workplace or family stress, and so on. The second half deals with treatment methods and insights of 22 sex therapists, including psychiatrist Pietropinto (coauthor, with Simenaur, of Beyond the Male Myth, 1977). Readers are encouraged to develop their own self-help programs by picking and choosing among various therapeutic approaches. Some types of sufferers (type can be determined by responding to a quiz) might go for experiential therapies, among them self-hypnosis, fantasy trips, and acting-out fantasies. Others might want to try physical exercises that enhance sensory awareness by massage and other sensual activities, up to but not including coitus--saved for another day. Then there's the cognitive approach, which aims to eliminate rigid (""I'm too old"") or negative (""nice people don't do that"") attitudes toward sex, and to open partners' minds to new and more satisyfing sexual experiences. A wide-ranging guide to sex-enhancement that gives credit to readers' intelligence and to their ability to develop their own problem-solving programs.

Pub Date: July 27th, 1990
Publisher: Doubleday