I DREAM HE TALKS TO ME

An acclaimed folk-rock singer and memoirist shares personal essays, reflections, and occasional poems about her autistic son.

Moorer’s son, John Henry, had just begun to speak his first words when he suddenly lost interest in every toy his mother offered him and went silent. A year later, he was diagnosed with severe Level 3 autism, which not only rendered him functionally mute, but also affected his “balance, coordination and motor skills.” The son of two musicians, John Henry would often become overwhelmed by the songs Moorer would sing or play for him. In reflecting on the bitter irony of her situation, the author writes, “I felt as if we had lost a way to bond on top of everything else.” As he grew older, John Henry would wake up in the middle of the night and wander, disrobe in public, begin screaming “for seemingly no reason” at inappropriate times, or become defiant and “refuse to take medicine.” His constant need for supervision proved especially difficult for a mother whose career required her to be on the road—not to mention her own personal crises, such as a breast cancer scare and, later, a divorce from John Henry’s father. Yet as Moorer gained a deeper understanding of her son’s neurodiversity, she gradually learned to appreciate the insights he gave her into living life with an open heart and mind and to surrender to his difference, in whatever ways it manifested. Poignant and profoundly humane, this book plumbs the depths of a mother-child connection and celebrates the human capacity to grow into graceful acceptance of the “wild and uncontrollable” nature of life. It’s clear that Moorer’s talents extend beyond music, as she builds on the literary promise she demonstrated in her acclaimed first book, Blood (2019).

A lyrically candid and heartfelt memoir.