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NOTHING TO CRY ABOUT: The Poignant, Triumphant Story of One Woman's Quest for Motherhood by Barbara J. Berg

NOTHING TO CRY ABOUT: The Poignant, Triumphant Story of One Woman's Quest for Motherhood

By

Pub Date: July 27th, 1981
Publisher: Seaview--dist. by Harper & Row

Although the prose vibrates unduly, this chronicle of a New York couple's very real ordeal on the way to parenthood does offer to other women (particularly those in their thirties who have difficulty carrying to term) a good deal of information on the nature and progress of certain medical procedures, a host of caveats, and, certainly, hope. Happily married for the second time to lawyer Arnie, father of a young daughter from a previous marriage, Berg had her first miscarriage in the fifth month of pregnancy, caused quite probably by inappropriate minor surgery and negligence on the part of a callous doctor. It was just after the horror of the fetal delivery, when the author was weeping, that a resident tossed off, ""It's nothing to cry about""--confirming feminist author and teacher Berg's conviction that much male-dominated ob/gyn care is insufferable. Rigorous research by Berg and a careful check of doctors brought the couple to competent physicians, and her trouble was diagnosed as a weak cervix--with a suturing prescribed for future pregnancies. Yet Bert lost her next baby for causes unknown. After a second suturing, careful surveillance, and three months in the hospital, a third attempt was successful. Throughout the miscarriage, stillbirth, and final triumph, Berg recounts periods of intense despair, restlessness, and some pain. But there were joyous events too--the satisfactions of teaching, a closer bond with stepdaughter Laurie, and most of all the adoption of baby Alison, after a vigorous search through lawyers and many disappointments. The couple returned from California with their new daughter--and baby Andrew on the way, Berg's first live birth. Berg's medical case will intrigue many, though the couple's circumstances are not typical: others may not have the funds or facilities to persevere in quite the same way. But her experience might encourage women with similar difficulties to scrutinize doctors and procedures, to do some research of their own, and above all not to give up.