LEAVING THE OFFICE BEHIND

Behavioral techniques for making a smooth, definite transition from work to home--not amiss in these careerist times. Mackoff, a Seattle therapist and corporate counselor, has touched a nerve: though she doesn't put it this way, the work-preoccupied male is now apt to have a work-preoccupied mate, not a resident social-director or sympathetic ear. So if they're to enjoy their time together, and achieve ""a balanced life,"" it behooves both of them to relax. Mackoff lays out the steps systematically: the three ""myths"" to shun (people-will-understand, you-can-be-your-unadorned-self, ""this is only temporary""); initial ways to let-up and slow down (sensibly, by running through tomorrow's tasks--or via some of the more fanciful visualization exercises habitual to this approach). There's a chapter on seeing the day's events in a humorous light that might get some laughs in itself--""Consider the possibilities of adding a musical score,"" pretend your worst moments were on Candid Camera. (Make like Joan Rivers, Rodney Dangerfield.) Then, back on earth, Mackoff takes up exercise--common excuses, practical solutions. (Don't be too snobby to try the Y, ""make your softball game a family outing."") A novel chapter deals with shop talk, and how to edit it down. And of course there's what you do after hours: from ""sharing your sweet and loving feelings,"" to cooking for company without fuss. In conclusion: some helpful, ungimmicky pointers for the working family (like teaching your kids to anticipate their needs), and some consideration of working at home. Not without silliness or mush--but worthwhile moves in a wise direction overall.