LOVE AND DISCIPLINE

Chatty, diffuse observations on child discipline--though better than the rigid prescriptions most such handbooks offer. As befits a long-time Bank Streeter (and author of emotionally-attuned children's books), Brenner emphasizes clear expectations, anticipating problems, and adjusting strategies to suit children's various needs. Each chapter takes up the issues of a particular age group--from ""Patterning Baby"" to ""Nine to Twelve: Value Years""--with brief descriptions of what parents may expect, specific suggestions on responding, and list of dos and don'ts. But under her broad definition of discipline--""Training that molds character and orderly thought and action""--Brenner includes a curious variety of topics. There are instructions on toilet training, getting kids to eat school-cafeteria food, handling a fascination with tire, and helping preteens complete work assignments (introduced with ""One, two, whatever you do, Start it well and carry it through""). Also, parents looking for an overall view of discipline and child-rearing will be disappointed: though individual topics (tantrums, drugs, sex) are easy to find, more general guidance can only be inferred. An agreeable extra, not a distinct contribution (or an advance on the best general parenting guides).