WHEN PARENTS DIVORCE by Bernard Steinzor


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In The Healing Partnership (1967) Dr. Steinzor discussed therapy with the focus on the doctor-patient relationship as an equalitarian venture; here he again stresses individual growth and destiny in an unorthodox but interesting treatise on divorce. Most divorce ""manuals"" to the contrary, Dr. Steinzor deplores the determinedly ""friendly"" divorce in which children receive the daddy-and-mommy-are-working-together-for-your-welfare-separate-but-equally treatment. How can parents who hate the sight of each other pretend for the child's sake? ""We appear to be asking divorced parents either to fake their emotions or to become saints."" Partners who have hurt one another, can easily, in forced proximity, hurt each other again. Once custody is established, the custodial parent should have absolutely free rein without interference or consultation; the visiting parent need not justify his procedures to the other. Contact should be at an absolute minimum between divorced parents. Freedom for the parents; freedom for the children to develop on the basis of realities rather than deceptions--freedom for the parent to create an unfettered relationship with the child--stem from an honest acceptance of the need for emotional independence. Dr. Steinzor investigates all aspects of divorce from the announcement (firm and final) to legal and financial matters. With a helpful reading list, this is well written, controversial, stimulating.

Pub Date: May 15th, 1969
Publisher: Pantheon