SELFISH & PERVERSE

A gay L.A. writer finds himself fishing for salmon—and men—in Alaska.

At 34, Nelson Kunker thought he’d be doing more with his life than fetching coffee as a script supervisor for a mediocre TV show, ignoring the novel he’s been claiming to write for a decade and searching wistfully for the boyfriend he claims he has no time for. But one fateful day, two promising men walk into the studio. Roy is a colleague’s cousin—a salmon fisherman and archeology student from Anchorage who all too conveniently shares Nelson’s love of science and kissing in elevators. Dylan, a theoretically straight movie star with a drug habit, is the much-anticipated guest star on the show. The three end up smoking pot in Dylan’s trailer, which gets Nelson fired and sets in motion a trip to Alaska following Roy’s return. Nelson and Roy quickly become committed boyfriends. But Dylan throws them both for a loop when they find out that he is not only gay but a nymphomaniac who is trying to steal Nelson from Roy (and sleep with Roy, too, while he’s at it). The trio leaves Anchorage for Coffee Point, where Roy spends seasons as a commercial fisherman, and Roy’s mother hires Nelson as a part of her crew. There, Nelson finds himself in a quandary. He still loves Roy, but, amazingly, despite his incorrigible cockiness and obnoxious disregard for the Alaskan culture and landscape, he is falling for Dylan, too. A visit from his best friend, Wendy, brings unexpected news—Nelson’s former boss had finally read his script and wants him to return to L.A. to talk about it. And, after the inevitable threesome, Roy and Nelson learn that Dylan isn’t exactly what he seems. The fishing world of Coffee Point is an interesting setting, particularly for a gay love triangle, but all its merit is drowned out by endless insipid banter, as much gratuitous sex as Smith can squeeze in and a complete lack of plot.

Less selfish & perverse than slow & pointless.