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What's Your Lane?

CAREER CLARITY FOR MOMS WHO WANT TO WORK A LITTLE, A LOT OR NOT AT ALL

Most parents could benefit from reading this smart, insightful guide about the realities of creating a work/life balance.

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A work of nonfiction by a certified career coach designed to help mothers decide which post-baby career path is right for them.

Abdilla identifies seven career lanes ranging from forgoing income and staying home with the kids to continuing to work full time and arranging for child care. Her tone is both warm and no-nonsense, and reading her advice feels like listening to a trusted friend who just happens to have a leg up on life experience. While she immediately comes across as an authority on juggling motherhood and career management, she’s also refreshingly realistic, admitting in her introduction, “We all screw ourselves in one way or another when it comes to our set up at home and our careers.” Her detailed descriptions of the pros and cons of each “lane” bring into relief common-sense arguments that might not be apparent to emotional and overwhelmed parents-to-be. In the chapter titled “The Slow Lane,” Abdilla notes that although working reduced hours might seem like the ideal solution for a career-minded mom, “You might condense a full-time job into less pay and have fewer hours to accomplish it.” While the specificity of the scenarios Abdilla outlines allows parents to decide which lane is best for them, it also means that readers will be able to skip inapplicable sections. There’s enough general information, however, to make the whole book a worthwhile read for most new parents. Interactive exercises are helpful and straightforward; some include sample answers to guide readers in completing them. Abdilla also offers information about her own past to help readers see how a person’s history influences his or her parenting style. A chapter about dividing household chores in a way that feels fair to both parents could be useful for any couple.

Most parents could benefit from reading this smart, insightful guide about the realities of creating a work/life balance.

Pub Date: April 9, 2013

ISBN: 978-1481904513

Page Count: 166

Publisher: CreateSpace

Review Posted Online: Aug. 6, 2013

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2013

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THE ESCAPE ARTIST

A vivid sequel that strains credulity.

Fremont (After Long Silence, 1999) continues—and alters—her story of how memories of the Holocaust affected her family.

At the age of 44, the author learned that her father had disowned her, declaring her “predeceased”—or dead in his eyes—in his will. It was his final insult: Her parents had stopped speaking to her after she’d published After Long Silence, which exposed them as Jewish Holocaust survivors who had posed as Catholics in Europe and America in order to hide multilayered secrets. Here, Fremont delves further into her tortured family dynamics and shows how the rift developed. One thread centers on her life after her harrowing childhood: her education at Wellesley and Boston University, the loss of her virginity to a college boyfriend before accepting her lesbianism, her stint with the Peace Corps in Lesotho, and her decades of work as a lawyer in Boston. Another strand involves her fraught relationship with her sister, Lara, and how their difficulties relate to their father, a doctor embittered after years in the Siberian gulag; and their mother, deeply enmeshed with her own sister, Zosia, who had married an Italian count and stayed in Rome to raise a child. Fremont tells these stories with novelistic flair, ending with a surprising theory about why her parents hid their Judaism. Yet she often appears insensitive to the serious problems she says Lara once faced, including suicidal depression. “The whole point of suicide, I thought, was to succeed at it,” she writes. “My sister’s completion rate was pathetic.” Key facts also differ from those in her earlier work. After Long Silence says, for example, that the author grew up “in a small city in the Midwest” while she writes here that she grew up in “upstate New York,” changes Fremont says she made for “consistency” in the new book but that muddy its narrative waters. The discrepancies may not bother readers seeking psychological insights rather than factual accuracy, but others will wonder if this book should have been labeled a fictionalized autobiography rather than a memoir.

A vivid sequel that strains credulity.

Pub Date: Feb. 11, 2020

ISBN: 978-1-982113-60-5

Page Count: 352

Publisher: Gallery Books/Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: Oct. 20, 2019

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 15, 2019

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AN INVISIBLE THREAD

THE TRUE STORY OF AN 11-YEAR-OLD PANHANDLER, A BUSY SALES EXECUTIVE, AND AN UNLIKELY MEETING WITH DESTINY

A straightforward tale of kindness and paying it forward in 1980s New York.

When advertising executive Schroff answered a child’s request for spare change by inviting him for lunch, she did not expect the encounter to grow into a friendship that would endure into his adulthood. The author recounts how she and Maurice, a promising boy from a drug-addicted family, learned to trust each other. Schroff acknowledges risks—including the possibility of her actions being misconstrued and the tension of crossing socio-economic divides—but does not dwell on the complexities of homelessness or the philosophical problems of altruism. She does not question whether public recognition is beneficial, or whether it is sufficient for the recipient to realize the extent of what has been done. With the assistance of People human-interest writer Tresniowski (Tiger Virtues, 2005, etc.), Schroff adheres to a personal narrative that traces her troubled relationship with her father, her meetings with Maurice and his background, all while avoiding direct parallels, noting that their childhoods differed in severity even if they shared similar emotional voids. With feel-good dramatizations, the story seldom transcends the message that reaching out makes a difference. It is framed in simple terms, from attributing the first meeting to “two people with complicated pasts and fragile dreams” that were “somehow meant to be friends” to the conclusion that love is a driving force. Admirably, Schroff notes that she did not seek a role as a “substitute parent,” and she does not judge Maurice’s mother for her lifestyle. That both main figures experience a few setbacks yet eventually survive is never in question; the story fittingly concludes with an epilogue by Maurice. For readers seeking an uplifting reminder that small gestures matter.

 

Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2011

ISBN: 978-1-4516-4251-3

Page Count: 288

Publisher: Howard Books/Simon & Schuster

Review Posted Online: July 26, 2011

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2011

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