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NOT MY SECRET TO KEEP

Name: NOT MY SECRET TO KEEP
Author: Digene Farrar
ISBN: 978-0-9904597-0-5

A MEMOIR OF HEALING FROM CHILDHOOD SEXUAL ABUSE

by Digene Farrar Cynthia Hurn ‧ RELEASE DATE: Oct. 30, 2014

A wrenching but inspiring account of a woman’s journey to self-acceptance.

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A model and nurse endured 9/11, but the experience reopened scars from a childhood trauma, as recounted in this debut memoir.

After winning a contest sponsored by MORE magazine, Farrar found herself pursuing her dream of modeling in New York. On the morning of Sept. 11, she was preparing for a casting when the planes hit the World Trade Center. Her training as a nurse kicked in, and she quickly responded by caring for wounded survivors. But while Farrar wasn’t physically injured, the attacks left her deeply traumatized. “It seems as if someone has snatched me out of my life, pulled me apart, and put me back together, leaving major pieces behind or reconnecting them to all the wrong places,” she recalls. Worse, the experience brought to the fore long-buried memories of the sexual, physical and emotional abuse she endured as a child, recollections which severely disrupted her life, her career and her marriage. As her modeling career thrived, Farrar committed herself to the often painful process of coming to terms with the horrible violence and violation she suffered as a child. Farrar’s firsthand account of the 2001 terrorist attacks is gripping, as is her dawning realization of the invisible damage that experience inflicted. She skillfully interweaves anecdotes about her career (including some entertaining tales about her time as a bit player in the 2004 film The Stepford Wives) with recollections of her efforts to work through her experiences. It was a painstaking process—she struggled to find a compatible, trustworthy therapist and was often beset by guilt and self-blame. Yet her writing is candid and unflinching as she unpacks the connections between the “lack of power” she felt as a child rape victim and “the sense of vulnerability” she had on 9/11. As she delved deeper into her past, she was finally able to speak openly about her experiences and to own her anger as she learned how to “express what I’ve had to lock deep inside for years.”

A wrenching but inspiring account of a woman’s journey to self-acceptance.

Pub Date: Oct. 30, 2014

ISBN: 978-0-9904597-0-5

Page Count: 273

Publisher: Portage Bay Press

Review Posted Online: Jan. 2, 2015

Review Program: Kirkus Indie

Categories:

GENERAL NONFICTION

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NUTCRACKER

by E.T.A. Hoffmann ‧ RELEASE DATE: Oct. 28, 1996

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This is not the Nutcracker sweet, as passed on by Tchaikovsky and Marius Petipa. No, this is the original Hoffmann tale of 1816, in which the froth of Christmas revelry occasionally parts to let the dark underside of childhood fantasies and fears peek through. The boundaries between dream and reality fade, just as Godfather Drosselmeier, the Nutcracker's creator, is seen as alternately sinister and jolly. And Italian artist Roberto Innocenti gives an errily realistic air to Marie's dreams, in richly detailed illustrations touched by a mysterious light. A beautiful version of this classic tale, which will captivate adults and children alike. (Nutcracker; $35.00; Oct. 28, 1996; 136 pp.; 0-15-100227-4)

Pub Date: Oct. 28, 1996

ISBN: 0-15-100227-4

Page Count: 136

Publisher: Harcourt

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Aug. 15, 1996

Categories:

GENERAL NONFICTION

- BOOK REVIEW
THE NUTCRACKER AND THE MOUSE KING
by E.T.A. Hoffmann ; adapted by Natalie Andrewson ; illustrated by Natalie Andrewson

- BOOK REVIEW
THE NUTCRACKER
by E.T.A. Hoffmann & illustrated by Julie Paschkis

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TO THE ONE I LOVE THE BEST

EPISODES FROM THE LIFE OF LADY MENDL (ELSIE DE WOLFE)

by Ludwig Bemelmans ‧ RELEASE DATE: Feb. 23, 1955

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An extravaganza in Bemelmans' inimitable vein, but written almost dead pan, with sly, amusing, sometimes biting undertones, breaking through. For Bemelmans was "the man who came to cocktails". And his hostess was Lady Mendl (Elsie de Wolfe), arbiter of American decorating taste over a generation. Lady Mendl was an incredible person,- self-made in proper American tradition on the one hand, for she had been haunted by the poverty of her childhood, and the years of struggle up from its ugliness,- until she became synonymous with the exotic, exquisite, worshipper at beauty's whrine. Bemelmans draws a portrait in extremes, through apt descriptions, through hilarious anecdote, through surprisingly sympathetic and understanding bits of appreciation. The scene shifts from Hollywood to the home she loved the best in Versailles. One meets in passing a vast roster of famous figures of the international and artistic set. And always one feels Bemelmans, slightly offstage, observing, recording, commenting, illustrated.