Designing woman"" and cabaret singer Carter (a.k.a. Julia Sugarbaker) shares with her fans her life's accumulated wisdom on everything from diet to religion. She plays the part of the chatty southern belle to the hilt, spicing her heaven-directed how-to's with tales of her Aunt Helen's perfect skin, the long dresses Miss Euna Smith would make Carter and her sisters for their piano recitals, and eating fish fresh out of the Tennessee River. For Carter, finding bliss in this life, if not in the next, is simple indeed: Always put on a little makeup, wear proper attire (which most decidedly does not include leggings and a baggy sweater), don't mix proteins and starches, mind your manners and your grammar (she even offers a lexicon of phrases she abhors). ""The essence of beauty, true beauty,"" however, lies not in the body, but in the mind. Carter recommends books and the arts (as long as they're not obscene or vulgar, like the work of Robert Mapplethorpe); and she exhorts Christians to defend their faith, which is under attack. Well, everyone's got their own idea of how to get to heaven.