A remarkable, if unevenly executed, story of grit and tenacity.
In this debut memoir, a Lithuanian woman recounts her immigration to the United States and her life’s work, driven by her Catholic faith.
Born in 1930 on a farm in small Bartininkai, Lithuania, Cipkus experienced a quaint county childhood with parents who instilled the importance of her religion, but she was aware that “the war was getting closer and closer every day.” Eventually, the family was shuffled from one refugee camp to another in Germany; along the way, Cipkus became separated from her father; her brother, Alfonsas; and her younger sister, Zina. The rest of the family eventually found themselves at the Seligenstadt Displaced Persons Camp, caught in postwar tensions between occupying forces. These gave way to an opportunity to leave Europe and come to America in 1949 with the family landing in Omaha, Nebraska, after reuniting with Zina. Cipkus’ teenage years were spent helping her mother and working in a hospital kitchen and a meatpacking plant before finding better employment at a Cleveland clothing company. There, she met her future husband, Stanley, and founded a real estate business. Later, Cipkus was drawn back into the struggles of fellow Lithuanian immigrants—particularly elderly people with health and communication problems. After writing a 1981 letter about them to President Ronald Reagan, Cipkus became involved in nonprofit and Housing and Urban Development funding for community projects, once again summoning her religious faith and inner resolve to overcome challenges. Cipkus’ straightforward prose style sometime feels emotionally flat, but it serves her well in narrating the horrors of World War II, as when she simply and effectively relates that “During the war, there was no real time to grieve.” There are also plenty of moving moments throughout the text, as when she expresses her gratefulness to Midwestern bus drivers who were kind to her soon after her arrival in the United States, or her shock at losing her adult son later in life. But Cipkus’ straight-to-the-point manner also results in some lengthy but unengaging summaries, as in her account of the complicated bureaucracy of HUD. Still, her overall, historic story of resilience will appeal to both Christian and secular readers.
A remarkable, if unevenly executed, story of grit and tenacity.Pub Date: N/A
ISBN: N/A
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Manuscript
Review Posted Online: March 19, 2021
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
The heartbreaking story of an emotionally battered child delivered with captivating candor and grace.
The former iCarly star reflects on her difficult childhood.
In her debut memoir, titled after her 2020 one-woman show, singer and actor McCurdy (b. 1992) reveals the raw details of what she describes as years of emotional abuse at the hands of her demanding, emotionally unstable stage mom, Debra. Born in Los Angeles, the author, along with three older brothers, grew up in a home controlled by her mother. When McCurdy was 3, her mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. Though she initially survived, the disease’s recurrence would ultimately take her life when the author was 21. McCurdy candidly reconstructs those in-between years, showing how “my mom emotionally, mentally, and physically abused me in ways that will forever impact me.” Insistent on molding her only daughter into “Mommy’s little actress,” Debra shuffled her to auditions beginning at age 6. As she matured and starting booking acting gigs, McCurdy remained “desperate to impress Mom,” while Debra became increasingly obsessive about her daughter’s physical appearance. She tinted her daughter’s eyelashes, whitened her teeth, enforced a tightly monitored regimen of “calorie restriction,” and performed regular genital exams on her as a teenager. Eventually, the author grew understandably resentful and tried to distance herself from her mother. As a young celebrity, however, McCurdy became vulnerable to eating disorders, alcohol addiction, self-loathing, and unstable relationships. Throughout the book, she honestly portrays Debra’s cruel perfectionist personality and abusive behavior patterns, showing a woman who could get enraged by everything from crooked eyeliner to spilled milk. At the same time, McCurdy exhibits compassion for her deeply flawed mother. Late in the book, she shares a crushing secret her father revealed to her as an adult. While McCurdy didn’t emerge from her childhood unscathed, she’s managed to spin her harrowing experience into a sold-out stage act and achieve a form of catharsis that puts her mind, body, and acting career at peace.
The heartbreaking story of an emotionally battered child delivered with captivating candor and grace.Pub Date: Aug. 9, 2022
ISBN: 978-1-982185-82-4
Page Count: 320
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: May 30, 2022
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 2022
SEEN & HEARD
SEEN & HEARD
SEEN & HEARD
This moving, potent testament might have been titled “Black Lives Matter.” Or: “An American Tragedy.”
The powerful story of a father’s past and a son’s future.
Atlantic senior writer Coates (The Beautiful Struggle: A Father, Two Sons, and an Unlikely Road to Manhood, 2008) offers this eloquent memoir as a letter to his teenage son, bearing witness to his own experiences and conveying passionate hopes for his son’s life. “I am wounded,” he writes. “I am marked by old codes, which shielded me in one world and then chained me in the next.” Coates grew up in the tough neighborhood of West Baltimore, beaten into obedience by his father. “I was a capable boy, intelligent and well-liked,” he remembers, “but powerfully afraid.” His life changed dramatically at Howard University, where his father taught and from which several siblings graduated. Howard, he writes, “had always been one of the most critical gathering posts for black people.” He calls it The Mecca, and its faculty and his fellow students expanded his horizons, helping him to understand “that the black world was its own thing, more than a photo-negative of the people who believe they are white.” Coates refers repeatedly to whites’ insistence on their exclusive racial identity; he realizes now “that nothing so essentialist as race” divides people, but rather “the actual injury done by people intent on naming us, intent on believing that what they have named matters more than anything we could ever actually do.” After he married, the author’s world widened again in New York, and later in Paris, where he finally felt extricated from white America’s exploitative, consumerist dreams. He came to understand that “race” does not fully explain “the breach between the world and me,” yet race exerts a crucial force, and young blacks like his son are vulnerable and endangered by “majoritarian bandits.” Coates desperately wants his son to be able to live “apart from fear—even apart from me.”
This moving, potent testament might have been titled “Black Lives Matter.” Or: “An American Tragedy.”Pub Date: July 8, 2015
ISBN: 978-0-8129-9354-7
Page Count: 176
Publisher: Spiegel & Grau
Review Posted Online: May 5, 2015
Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 2015
BOOK REVIEW
BOOK REVIEW
SEEN & HEARD
BOOK TO SCREEN
BOOK TO SCREEN
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