The First Best Thing

Debut author and illustrator Rothman tells a story of bullying, adolescent angst and psychological growth.

Moving to a different state would be difficult for any 11-year-old, but when you factor in debilitating shyness, overwhelming self-consciousness, and the remnants of a bad perm, you get one really miserable adolescent. Erin experiences school bullying (including being stuffed in a garbage can) and feels alienated from her family (including two pretty sisters). “I locked myself in my bedroom every day and every night, listening to how happy my family was without me, knowing that they would always be happier without me,” she says. Her misery and self-doubt make her angry and resentful, but just when her story seems to be turning into a plea for help, she finds a glimmer of hope: “I decided then that I would never think a thought of hate again.” She decides to convert all her negative thoughts and beliefs to positive ones and to find something good in things she previously despised. For example, she praises her beautiful eyes, despite the fact that she believes her face is ugly. By doing so, she achieves, if not actual happiness, a level of peace—the first best thing. Rothman presents alternating pages of brief text, from a single sentence to a very short paragraph in length, and illustrations vaguely reminiscent of Vincent Van Gogh’s 1889 painting Starry Night. As a result, her book falls into an unusual genre: a picture book for young adults. Aside from its raw, heartbreaking pain (and a teacher’s allegation that Erin dresses like a “slut”), this book would likely be suitable for all ages and could be required reading for schools’ anti-bullying programs.

An illustrated story that, despite its brevity, packs an emotional punch.