After spending sixteen years in the priesthood. Father Girandola broke with it formally when he realized that ""if celibacy is not of his nature, how can it be his vow."" He had fallen in love with a nurse. Lorraine, but his decision to marry her was preceded by many years of doubt as well as despair (a breakdown--psychiatric help--like ""aspirin for cancer"") and the belief that celibacy created inadequacies not only in his personal life but in his priesthood. Waiting for the excommunication proceedings (hoping for a dispensation) he and Lorraine lived in sin both socially and theologically; he had great difficulty in getting a job; even his mother said ""I hope you die"" to Lorraine when she became pregnant. Eventually Father Girandola opened a halfway house in Florida for priests who have been laicized and others cut off from their church--he believes ""everybody has a right to receive Christ"" and is holding Mass. Other inconsistent and intransigent aspects of the dogma he challenges: divorce, birth control, confession. . . all live coal issues and the firebrand Father, who has had nationwide attention in the press, ardently argues for liberalization but in his defiance is no less devout.