THE POWER OF SMALL WINS

Lancaster distills four decades of mentorship, social work, and familiarity with the juvenile justice system into a guide with timeless advice for 10- to 13-year-old boys—and the adults raising them.

The author—who once worked as a probation officer for youth in Los Angeles, and later as director of the county’s juvenile justice department—sets out 10 core attributes that he says that boys need to flourish, involving increasing physical activity, increasing emotional intelligence, showing leadership, and having faith (religious or otherwise). Lancaster then outlines incremental, actionable steps that boys can take to build “super performance confidence” based on these ideas. Each chapter is divided into sections “for the boys,” “for the parents,” and sometimes “for teachers,” with an emphasis on shared accountability and small, celebratory ways of marking one’s progress. The book opens with a frank diagnosis of the challenges boys face today, and unlike most contemporary self-help books, it doesn’t dwell on cellphones. Instead, it aims directly for issues that excessive screen use can reveal: increasing hostility, disengagement, and emotional disarray. Whether this approach is effective will depend on each reader and their specific life situation. However, Lancaster’s upbeat, wholesome attitude and generosity are broadly appealing. He blends old-school values and easy-to-use point systems to encourage reflection, movement, gratitude, and structure, coaching boys on such actions as managing screen time, getting enough sleep, and journaling with an aim of self-understanding. The work is grounded in lived experience and an overall sense of love, rather than abstract psychology. Its advice strives to be immediately useful and often seems easy to implement. Stylistically, Lancaster leans into wholesome metaphors about sports and other topics, which work because they’re timeless, not trendy. As a result, the prose sometimes borders on quaint, but the book’s charm lies in its unselfconscious warmth and moral compass. For any parent willing to sit down with their son and go through it, chapter by chapter, this book may offer a meaningful blueprint for building confidence and character.

A straightforward manual that may offer valuable tips for youth willing to listen.