CARRY ME

Women offer their perspectives on miscarriage and pregnancy loss in this debut nonfiction book.

In this work, Hoffman reflects on her own pregnancy loss and shares the stories of other women who have experienced miscarriages and stillbirths. The women profiled in the volume describe the physical and emotional experiences of pregnancy and loss, their grieving processes, and their recommendations for making a miscarriage more manageable. The tales reflect a variety of experiences, including infertility, unplanned pregnancy, other kids born before or after the miscarriages, and the choice to remain childfree. Some of the stories are about recent miscarriages, while others happened decades ago but still reverberate. Each tale is told from the perspective of the pregnant woman, but many discuss a partner’s reaction to loss as well. (There is some diversity in the backgrounds of the women featured in the book, but as Hoffman notes in her introduction, nearly all are White, cisgender, and in heterosexual relationships.) Each woman is the subject of a different chapter, and her story is presented largely in her own words, in the context of an interview conducted by Hoffman. The author often asks the participants to expand on their responses or interpret their reactions. The distinct voices of the women come through clearly, making for an engaging and highly readable narrative. There are several commonalities across the women’s tales: Nearly all felt abandoned by medical professionals, and most were unaware of how common miscarriages were before experiencing one. While Hoffman does not make specific policy recommendations, the book makes it clear that both education and support are lacking, and several of the women offer suggestions for improvement. Readers who have experienced miscarriages may find the work triggering, but it has the potential to serve as a tool for healing as well. The volume may also be of particular interest to people pursuing pregnancy, as it does an excellent job of providing information about a common occurrence that is rarely discussed before it happens.

An informative and enlightening look at the experience of pregnancy loss.