Instead of the myths of marriage, like ""love will conquer all,"" try the reality (like ""we are not in love all the time""), say the authors of this trivial and trendy band-aid for terminally ill marriages. Draw up a ""fight inventory"" to catalog old battles, they recommend, and see how they can be changed (presumably to new battles). If all the quizzing and time-parsing and conferring fails to change your ""script,"" you may well ask ""How long should we struggle?"" ""This is an important question,"" say the authors in a form of understatement usually reserved for white settlers confronting a spot of trouble with the natives. ""After you have made every possible effort to save your marriage, you will know when it's over."" Thanks a lot.