WITNESS TO TWO WORLDS

A debut memoir that brings readers inside the harrowing experience of bipolar episodes.

In 1952, when May was 4 years old, her father left their small Italian town of Via Aeilla and set sail for the United States on his own. May felt a deep sense of loneliness during her father’s absence, and it was with great joy that she stepped aboard the Andrea Doria with her mother and younger sister, Lucia, in 1954, ready to begin a new life in Malvern, Ohio, and, most especially, to be reunited with her dad. But the poverty-stricken family struggled, and the author’s father drank heavily and was subject to rages, while her sorrowful mother turned to religion for solace. As years went by, May focused on achieving good grades to overcome her insecurity. In 1968, during her sophomore year at the College of Steubenville, Ohio, she slipped on a wet dormitory floor and fell on her back. She was treated for a concussion and, afterward, experienced her first severe episode of depression. Several days later, her parents committed her to a local hospital’s psychiatric wing, where doctors subjected her to excruciating shock therapy, which she describes in frightening detail. Thus begins the story of May’s struggles with mental illness, although it wouldn’t be until her second breakdown, in 1981, that she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. May proves to be an eloquent and occasionally lyrical wordsmith, as when she describes the visceral experience of her second commitment as well as her terrifying delusions and rages. However, the narrative often jumps back and forth between times and places as it pieces together the trajectory of the author’s life, resulting in excessive repetition of details of family history. She also notes her family’s long-held conviction that her fall caused her mental illness, without explaining how it might have caused it. However, her poignant presentation of her feelings of shame and denial and her ultimately successful battle for self-acceptance highlight the importance of fighting the stigma attached to mental disorders.

A disturbing but illuminating work that families of mentally ill people will find relatable.