THE LAST TESTAMENT

A real publishing “get”: With the assistance of former Daily Show head writer Javerbaum (co-author: Earth: The Book, 2010, etc.), the Author (of everything) answers age-old mysteries with some unaccustomed straight talk.

Though the media-savvy Creator proves to be a 21st-century deity, he reveals, in this tell-all memoir, that he took a century off since sinking the Titanic in 1912. Apparently, he was messing with other universes. Now He’s back and funnier than His first rib tickler with Adam and Steve; for lo, Steve came before Eve! Revelations, of interest to Jews, Christians, Muslims, the Perpetually Confused and a few fans of stray gods, cover such earthly matters as food, sports, crusades, America and, ever popular, sex. Many ecclesiastical secrets are explained in chapter and verse marked by faith, piety and extreme silliness. The Author, CEO of a major enterprise, takes time from His busy schedule to present much Holy Shtick. Judging by the jacket photo, the Timeless One hasn’t aged since the official portrait by Michelangelo. Certainly, there are, as in His prior books, some arid, less-than-hilarious passages, but his Self-given wit offers much mirth for heathens and other Americans. Before we come to the End (of Days and the memoir), the Author provides a big finish with boffo one-liners regarding eschatological matters. Warning: If this text doesn’t meet sales expectations, there may be Hell to pay. A heretic’s theological guide, some of which may passeth the understanding of the Bible Belt faithful but, lo, still damned comical. Amen.