With relative restraint, Zerof (Director of the Charlotte, No. Car., Marriage and Family Institute) tries to fill in the pits on the rocky road of matrimony--or if you like, cohabitation. The sexual aspect of a relationship, he contends, exacts a price. In a good relationship, it's less. In a bad one, more. ""When intimacy is not found, sex often becomes too important."" The object of the exercise, then, is to lessen the emotional price inherent in the couple's sexuality by increasing the kind of friendly intimacy that makes relationships grow. So Zerof provides some Steps to intimacy (learning to like each other is critical) as well as Six Principles of Effective Communication (including tips on how to recognize vulnerabilities when a conflict arises; how to keep the focus of an argument specific; and how to learn to listen), the whole designed to help you achieve reasonable tranquility in your relationship. No psychobabble here--be thankful for small favors--but no great flashes of insight either. This is just so-so.