A woman dissatisfied with her present circumstances seeks solace in a past situationship.
At 37, Zuzu lives in New York with her high-powered attorney wife, Agnes, and their son, Gideon, and her resentment grows with every email Agnes sends. When Gideon is invited to spend the weekend with a friend, Zuzu and Agnes plan a trip to Massachusetts to check on Agnes’s ex-girlfriend, who’s had a health scare, and visit Zuzu’s college friend and eternal crush, Cash, who lives nearby. Then Zuzu’s estranged father dies, so they fold his memorial service into their plans. Grief, nostalgia, and midlife ennui drive Zuzu to act out. The novel moves from the present to Zuzu’s college escapades with Cash to her meet-cute with Agnes. Zuzu fell in love with Agnes in law school, and while Agnes excelled in her career, Zuzu failed the bar twice. Narrating the story, Zuzu explains that all she’s ever really wanted is to be desired. She pines for Cash, whose marriage also seems to be faltering. Though she loves Agnes, she frames their life together as a consolation prize to what her life could have been with Cash had he only wanted her the way she still so desperately needs him to. The weekend forces Zuzu to confront how little she’s grown in two decades. Much of the story relies on happenstance: First, Zuzu’s father dies. Then, it just so happens that Noel, the only other biracial person Zuzu knew growing up, attended the same college she did and now lives in the apartment above her sister’s house. Zuzu is his obsession, and he’s always on hand for her to toy with, the same way Cash toys with her. Zuzu’s experience of race is regularly referenced without being fully explored, stunting an otherwise engaging throughline. Finally, a sudden repair required in Cash’s house leads his wife and daughter to leave town for the weekend. He conveniently stays behind, alone in a hotel. It’s fine, necessary even, for characters to behave badly, and for coincidence to play a part, but they should do so in interesting ways.
The characters and themes at the center of this story don’t quite deliver.