HOW TO GET INVITED TO THE WHITE HOUSE

An ex-presidential speechwriter, lawyer, and TV host has turned upward mobility into a slightly devious science. Here's how to gain social acceptance, get invitations, free hotel rooms, free research, free drinks, unlisted phone numbers, and other lush tidbits that lift one out of the commonplace and into the rare. One of the author's protÉgeÉs: a secretary who was wallflowering her way through a stint at the Kennedy White House. Humes instructed her to soak her head in the sink at the ladies' room in the Presidential pool every day at lunchtime. Since only Kennedy intimates were invited to use the pool, the obvious connections were made, and the girl's popularity rose with her frizzies. Another protÉgeÉ was told to have calling cards made, rent a limo for an afternoon, and spend the time peppering the place with her cards. Her life improved too. One good outfit, this little volume, and a large dose of chutzpah and you, too, can dance at the palace. Cute stuff, amusingly presented.