Next book

TO HAVE AND TO HOLD

Come back, Jemima J (2000)!

Mousy woman weds philandering jerk.

A lackluster array of supposedly sophisticated characters fall in and out of love and marriage in Green’s uninspired sixth outing (a “#1-bestselling blockbuster novel in Britain,” we’re told). Alice Chambers is a shy but successful caterer who’s romanced by Joe, a good-looking womanizer: he’s oh-so-amused by her essential innocence and what passes for self-deprecating wit about terribly important things like expensive footwear that pinches (“Bloody Jimmy Choos”). Airheads on both sides of the Atlantic will be impressed by heaps and heaps of brittle oh-darling dialogue and brand-name-y prose, plus a general sense of throwaway fabulousness that would bring a chilly smile even to Anna Wintour’s narrow lips. Joe and Alice move through a slice of Manhattan that’s as thin and unreal as they are—from Bergdorf’s on 57th St. to the posh Vietnamese eatery Le Colonial a few blocks south, and that’s it, though Wall Street is mentioned once or twice. (That’s where Joe does something with money, darling.) Throwaway fabulousness, however, does not come cheap. Joe prefers New York for female-fondling escapades, but Alice flees to Connecticut and takes up gardening, finding comfort in fluffy puppies and vicarious adultery, thanks to women writers. Her carelessly elegant attire escapes the dreaded Westport effect—no navy plaid skirts and boiled-wool blazers for our Alice—as Diesel jeans and muddy Wellies get her noticed. Or is it actually her trim tummy and newfound self-confidence? And what about Joe, who’s worried about getting his bunny boiled by an out-of-control mistress? Oh, darling, it’s all so ironic. And all written in the present tense, too . . . .

Come back, Jemima J (2000)!

Pub Date: May 18, 2004

ISBN: 0-7679-1226-8

Page Count: 432

Publisher: Broadway

Review Posted Online: June 24, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: April 1, 2004

Categories:
Next book

SUMMER ISLAND

The best-selling author of tearjerkers like Angel Falls (2000) serves up yet another mountain of mush, topped off with...

Talk-show queen takes tumble as millions jeer.

Nora Bridges is a wildly popular radio spokesperson for family-first virtues, but her loyal listeners don't know that she walked out on her husband and teenaged daughters years ago and didn't look back. Now that a former lover has sold racy pix of naked Nora and horny himself to a national tabloid, her estranged daughter Ruby, an unsuccessful stand-up comic in Los Angeles, has been approached to pen a tell-all. Greedy for the fat fee she's been promised, Ruby agrees and heads for the San Juan Islands, eager to get reacquainted with the mom she plans to betray. Once in the family homestead, nasty Ruby alternately sulks and glares at her mother, who is temporarily wheelchair-bound as a result of a post-scandal car crash. Uncaring, Ruby begins writing her side of the story when she's not strolling on the beach with former sweetheart Dean Sloan, the son of wealthy socialites who basically ignored him and his gay brother Eric. Eric, now dying of cancer and also in a wheelchair, has returned to the island. This dismal threesome catch up on old times, recalling their childhood idylls on the island. After Ruby's perfect big sister Caroline shows up, there's another round of heartfelt talk. Nora gradually reveals the truth about her unloving husband and her late father's alcoholism, which led her to seek the approval of others at the cost of her own peace of mind. And so on. Ruby is aghast to discover that she doesn't know everything after all, but Dean offers her subdued comfort. Happy endings await almost everyone—except for readers of this nobly preachy snifflefest.

The best-selling author of tearjerkers like Angel Falls (2000) serves up yet another mountain of mush, topped off with syrupy platitudes about life and love.

Pub Date: March 1, 2001

ISBN: 0-609-60737-5

Page Count: 336

Publisher: Crown

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Jan. 15, 2001

Categories:
Next book

LAST ORDERS

Britisher Swift's sixth novel (Ever After, 1992 etc.) and fourth to appear here is a slow-to-start but then captivating tale of English working-class families in the four decades following WW II. When Jack Dodds dies suddenly of cancer after years of running a butcher shop in London, he leaves a strange request—namely, that his ashes be scattered off Margate pier into the sea. And who could better be suited to fulfill this wish than his three oldest drinking buddies—insurance man Ray, vegetable seller Lenny, and undertaker Vic, all of whom, like Jack himself, fought also as soldiers or sailors in the long-ago world war. Swift's narrative start, with its potential for the melodramatic, is developed instead with an economy, heart, and eye that release (through the characters' own voices, one after another) the story's humanity and depth instead of its schmaltz. The jokes may be weak and self- conscious when the three old friends meet at their local pub in the company of the urn holding Jack's ashes; but once the group gets on the road, in an expensive car driven by Jack's adoptive son, Vince, the story starts gradually to move forward, cohere, and deepen. The reader learns in time why it is that no wife comes along, why three marriages out of three broke apart, and why Vince always hated his stepfather Jack and still does—or so he thinks. There will be stories of innocent youth, suffering wives, early loves, lost daughters, secret affairs, and old antagonisms—including a fistfight over the dead on an English hilltop, and a strewing of Jack's ashes into roiling seawaves that will draw up feelings perhaps unexpectedly strong. Without affectation, Swift listens closely to the lives that are his subject and creates a songbook of voices part lyric, part epic, part working-class social realism—with, in all, the ring to it of the honest, human, and true.

Pub Date: April 5, 1996

ISBN: 0-679-41224-7

Page Count: 304

Publisher: Knopf

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 15, 1996

Categories:
Close Quickview