THE SECRET INGREDIENT

Perfectionist wife slips a potion into her less-than-perfect husband’s orange juice.

Elizabeth Baskin figures she’s doing him a favor. After all, Roger used to be her ideal man: brainy plus lots of fun in bed and out. But the handsome attorney has become a workaholic—and a jowly glutton with an appetite for Cheetos and penchant for long naps. He’s still a nice guy, but that’s not good enough for the exacting Elizabeth, an undercover inspector of swanky hotels for AMLP (America’s Most Luxurious Properties) who expects the best and usually gets it. She pays a call on Dr. Gordon Farkus of Beverly Hills (whose mysterious life-enhancing herbal concoctions get raves from celebrities) and afterward sneaks a packet of green stuff into her husband’s juice every morning. Bingo! Roger gets up from the sofa and is a sex machine who, um, takes Elizabeth on every available surface. He’s such fun that he makes Elizabeth into the one who wants to nap. So Roger dusts off his dancing shoes—and goes clubbing with a younger woman, not the predictable twist that control-freak Elizabeth had in mind. But Roger isn’t her only problem. A disgruntled hotel manager is harassing her because his establishment lost its coveted five-key rating thanks to her scathing review. Being a professional faultfinder isn’t as satisfying as it used to be—in fact, Roger is actually finding fault with her! Desperate calls to Dr. Farkus aren’t returned, so Elizabeth, figuring there must be an antidote, breaks in to ransack the doctor’s files and is promptly arrested. Contrite, she confesses all to Roger, who’s deeply hurt and heads for his favorite mountain to think things over. She goes after—and is followed by the disgruntled hotel manager, who ties her to a tree and . . . .

A ho-hum contemporary fairy tale from Heller (Female Intelligence, 2001, etc.).