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EVEN WHEN YOU LIE TO ME

Ultimately, readers see almost none of the anguish that this relationship would likely have caused Charlie, which...

Charlie, an insecure high school senior, finds herself in a troubling relationship with a teacher.

Charlie’s tense relationships with her casually cruel mother and her beautiful best friend pop up occasionally in this story, but the distressing heart of the book is Charlie’s relationship with Mr. Drummond, a man who deliberately blurs the lines between teacher and student by swearing in class, engaging in sexual innuendo, and initiating lots of “playful” physical contact with students. When lonely Charlie blossoms under his teasing attentions, he quickly encourages her crush through inappropriately personal, private conversations with her after school about his failed marriage; his reaction to finding her stalking him at his gym is to take her out to lunch. Though it takes some time, readers will be unsurprised by the graphically depicted sexual escalation of the relationship, especially given the increasingly shocking series of encounters that leads up to it. That is, shocking to readers though not to Charlie, who narrates the story with an all-too-believable, single-minded cluelessness. They are given glimpses of Drummond’s ambivalence and remorse, but a disturbing “what might have been” moment he and Charlie share at her graduation ends both story and Charlie’s character arc with unsatisfying ambiguity.

Ultimately, readers see almost none of the anguish that this relationship would likely have caused Charlie, which dangerously de-emphasizes the predatory nature of Mr. Drummond’s attentions. (Fiction. 14-18)

Pub Date: June 9, 2015

ISBN: 978-0-385-39116-0

Page Count: 352

Publisher: Crown

Review Posted Online: Feb. 15, 2015

Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2015

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IF ONLY I HAD TOLD HER

A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind.

In this companion novel to 2013’s If He Had Been With Me, three characters tell their sides of the story.

Finn’s narrative starts three days before his death. He explores the progress of his unrequited love for best friend Autumn up until the day he finally expresses his feelings. Finn’s story ends with his tragic death, which leaves his close friends devastated, unmoored, and uncertain how to go on. Jack’s section follows, offering a heartbreaking look at what it’s like to live with grief. Jack works to overcome the anger he feels toward Sylvie, the girlfriend Finn was breaking up with when he died, and Autumn, the girl he was preparing to build his life around (but whom Jack believed wasn’t good enough for Finn). But when Jack sees how Autumn’s grief matches his own, it changes their understanding of one another. Autumn’s chapters trace her life without Finn as readers follow her struggles with mental health and balancing love and loss. Those who have read the earlier book will better connect with and feel for these characters, particularly since they’ll have a more well-rounded impression of Finn. The pain and anger is well written, and the novel highlights the most troublesome aspects of young adulthood: overconfidence sprinkled with heavy insecurities, fear-fueled decisions, bad communication, and brash judgments. Characters are cued white.

A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind. (author’s note, content warning) (Fiction. 14-18)

Pub Date: Feb. 6, 2024

ISBN: 9781728276229

Page Count: 416

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

Review Posted Online: Jan. 5, 2024

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 1, 2024

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IF HE HAD BEEN WITH ME

There’s not much plot here, but readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.

The finely drawn characters capture readers’ attention in this debut.

Autumn and Phineas, nicknamed Finny, were born a week apart; their mothers are still best friends. Growing up, Autumn and Finny were like peas in a pod despite their differences: Autumn is “quirky and odd,” while Finny is “sweet and shy and everyone like[s] him.” But in eighth grade, Autumn and Finny stop being friends due to an unexpected kiss. They drift apart and find new friends, but their friendship keeps asserting itself at parties, shared holiday gatherings and random encounters. In the summer after graduation, Autumn and Finny reconnect and are finally ready to be more than friends. But on August 8, everything changes, and Autumn has to rely on all her strength to move on. Autumn’s coming-of-age is sensitively chronicled, with a wide range of experiences and events shaping her character. Even secondary characters are well-rounded, with their own histories and motivations.

There’s not much plot here, but readers will relish the opportunity to climb inside Autumn’s head.   (Fiction. 14 & up)

Pub Date: April 1, 2013

ISBN: 978-1-4022-7782-5

Page Count: 336

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

Review Posted Online: Feb. 12, 2013

Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2013

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