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I Just Want Out

SEVEN CAREFUL STEPS TO LEAVING YOUR EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE HUSBAND

An insightful, empathetic strategy for separation.

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Life coach Schuelke shares lessons that she learned from planning her exit from an emotionally abusive marriage in this debut how-to guide.

In the late 1980s, the author, then 15, started dating the man who would become her husband. Early on, she sensed problems, she writes: he had a difficult family history, including mental illness and suicide, and was argumentative and controlling. It took the birth of her second son in the late 1990s and embarrassing incidents in front of family members in the early 2000s before Schuelke finally decided to leave. In this guide, she draws from that experience, outlining what she terms a “FREEDOM Framework,” consisting of seven steps: “Free Your Mind…And the Rest Will Follow,” “Research and Documentation,” “Evaluate Your Current Situation,” “Exercise Your Rights,” “Design Your Exit, “Prepare For Opposition,” and “Make Your Move.” She discusses “pre-work” to be “done in a subtle and secret manner,” including assessing and setting up finances in order to make one’s transition as smooth as possible. Schuelke points readers to checklists for each step, available on her website, and also conveys the happy news that she advanced in her career and found a better relationship with her second husband. Overall, the author’s personal story lends credence and power to the practical advice that she offers in this guide. Although her detailing of how to determine one’s current assets, benefits, and rights occupies a large part of her commentary here, it serves as a useful reminder of the importance of due diligence so that one may be best informed before moving on to divorce: “Being prepared worked in my favor when it came to the financial split of assets and the payout I was awarded at the final divorce hearing,” she writes. She also tempers her guidance with admissions of her own challenges and setbacks in making her exit.

An insightful, empathetic strategy for separation.

Pub Date: March 7, 2016

ISBN: N/A

Page Count: 134

Publisher: Difference Press

Review Posted Online: Aug. 30, 2016

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KILLERS OF THE FLOWER MOON

THE OSAGE MURDERS AND THE BIRTH OF THE FBI

Dogged original research and superb narrative skills come together in this gripping account of pitiless evil.

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Greed, depravity, and serial murder in 1920s Oklahoma.

During that time, enrolled members of the Osage Indian nation were among the wealthiest people per capita in the world. The rich oil fields beneath their reservation brought millions of dollars into the tribe annually, distributed to tribal members holding "headrights" that could not be bought or sold but only inherited. This vast wealth attracted the attention of unscrupulous whites who found ways to divert it to themselves by marrying Osage women or by having Osage declared legally incompetent so the whites could fleece them through the administration of their estates. For some, however, these deceptive tactics were not enough, and a plague of violent death—by shooting, poison, orchestrated automobile accident, and bombing—began to decimate the Osage in what they came to call the "Reign of Terror." Corrupt and incompetent law enforcement and judicial systems ensured that the perpetrators were never found or punished until the young J. Edgar Hoover saw cracking these cases as a means of burnishing the reputation of the newly professionalized FBI. Bestselling New Yorker staff writer Grann (The Devil and Sherlock Holmes: Tales of Murder, Madness, and Obsession, 2010, etc.) follows Special Agent Tom White and his assistants as they track the killers of one extended Osage family through a closed local culture of greed, bigotry, and lies in pursuit of protection for the survivors and justice for the dead. But he doesn't stop there; relying almost entirely on primary and unpublished sources, the author goes on to expose a web of conspiracy and corruption that extended far wider than even the FBI ever suspected. This page-turner surges forward with the pacing of a true-crime thriller, elevated by Grann's crisp and evocative prose and enhanced by dozens of period photographs.

Dogged original research and superb narrative skills come together in this gripping account of pitiless evil.

Pub Date: April 18, 2017

ISBN: 978-0-385-53424-6

Page Count: 352

Publisher: Doubleday

Review Posted Online: Feb. 1, 2017

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Feb. 15, 2017

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BETWEEN THE WORLD AND ME

NOTES ON THE FIRST 150 YEARS IN AMERICA

This moving, potent testament might have been titled “Black Lives Matter.” Or: “An American Tragedy.”

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The powerful story of a father’s past and a son’s future.

Atlantic senior writer Coates (The Beautiful Struggle: A Father, Two Sons, and an Unlikely Road to Manhood, 2008) offers this eloquent memoir as a letter to his teenage son, bearing witness to his own experiences and conveying passionate hopes for his son’s life. “I am wounded,” he writes. “I am marked by old codes, which shielded me in one world and then chained me in the next.” Coates grew up in the tough neighborhood of West Baltimore, beaten into obedience by his father. “I was a capable boy, intelligent and well-liked,” he remembers, “but powerfully afraid.” His life changed dramatically at Howard University, where his father taught and from which several siblings graduated. Howard, he writes, “had always been one of the most critical gathering posts for black people.” He calls it The Mecca, and its faculty and his fellow students expanded his horizons, helping him to understand “that the black world was its own thing, more than a photo-negative of the people who believe they are white.” Coates refers repeatedly to whites’ insistence on their exclusive racial identity; he realizes now “that nothing so essentialist as race” divides people, but rather “the actual injury done by people intent on naming us, intent on believing that what they have named matters more than anything we could ever actually do.” After he married, the author’s world widened again in New York, and later in Paris, where he finally felt extricated from white America’s exploitative, consumerist dreams. He came to understand that “race” does not fully explain “the breach between the world and me,” yet race exerts a crucial force, and young blacks like his son are vulnerable and endangered by “majoritarian bandits.” Coates desperately wants his son to be able to live “apart from fear—even apart from me.”

This moving, potent testament might have been titled “Black Lives Matter.” Or: “An American Tragedy.”

Pub Date: July 8, 2015

ISBN: 978-0-8129-9354-7

Page Count: 176

Publisher: Spiegel & Grau

Review Posted Online: May 5, 2015

Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 1, 2015

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