Dr. Kappelman, a professor of Pediatrics and author of What Your Child Is All About, indicates how modern times--dissolution of the family, women's lib, the rise of divorce, etc.--have led to that one and only child. Much of what he says applies to any child, even in large families, say on the handling of rebellion; some of what he says is obvious--the only child needs to have more structured activities with other children; he may be overreliant on a fantasy world or a fantasy figure (could he not be looking at more television?). But Dr. Kappelman does contraindicate trying to make him an overachiever in any area; no doubt he is most affected by either divorce or death having no sibling to share the deprivation or--ecch--""the delicious secrets of intimate sexual behavior."" Nor can you agree that there is still ""much controversy"" about telling a child that he is adopted. Still and overall, there's some instruction for that overanxious parent of that single pea in the pod who has a few things going for him--particularly your undivided love and concern. Functional guiding and guarding.