ELLEN ANDERS ON HER OWN

A book acknowledging that, for a sixth grader coping with bereavement, grieving is as much about changing relationships as it is about healing. Blond, smart Ellen, who's been with the same kids since preschool, is especially close to Abby and Jen. Their friendship pact is symbolized by a braid of their entwined blond, black, and brown hair; they're loyally allied against the boy- crazy ``Dandy Dames.'' Months after her mother died in a car crash, Ellen finds the diary she kept at age 12 and is startled to discover that her mother sounds like a '60s version of the silly Dandy Dames. Meanwhile, Abby is gravitating toward the popular group. Longing for a mother to advise her and explain the diary, Ellen finally spills her troubles to her father, who offers insights and observations on both situations and, without providing solutions, encourages Ellen to embrace her mother's positive outlook on life. All ends well with a class party and a diary for Ellen. With lean, low-key writing, Hirsch gives Ellen's problems real respect. (Fiction. 8-12)