THE MINISTER'S WIFE

A memoir chronicles the life of an Anglican minister’s spouse.

Stiller met her husband, Brent, in college in 1988. After Brent finished his master’s degree, he was ordained in the Anglican Church. The couple originally thought they might spend much of their adult lives working in Africa. But, as things turned out, they wound up living in various towns in Canada. The people in these towns had certain expectations about the wife of a minister. Some thought the author would be judgmental, know how to play the organ, or be upset if they didn’t pray properly before a meal. As Stiller explains, she was just as human as the next person. She was all thumbs with houseplants and felt pangs of envy about someone else’s spiritual life. In reality, friendships could be difficult. The Christmas season tended to be taxing. Words sometimes came out wrong. But while she experienced awkward situations, Stiller also found warmth and happiness. The author writes how, even with its challenges, church “helps us welcome each other, carry each other.” The book takes on a breezy, honest air as it moves between chapters with titles like “Community,” “Prayer,” and “Forgiveness.” There are remembered disagreements the author had with her husband and, perhaps most entertaining, strange things people said over the years. This is the case when a dinner guest asserted rather bluntly: “You have better stuff than we do.” Such recollections are not only funny, they also give readers a fine grasp of what Stiller’s life was actually like. Some episodes are not quite as telling. The author reflects fondly on swimming with a friend in Cold Lake, and, heartfelt though the memory is, it seems to just reiterate that friendships can be nice. Still, the good, the bad, and the beautiful are all finely blended here for a full picture.

This account provides an engrossing look at what it means to be a minister’s wife.