LIVING FORWARD AFTER LOSS

A compact manual for surviving the unthinkable.

Ho devotes her slim nonfiction debut to one of the worst ordeals that a person can endure: the loss of a life partner. Many survivors feel completely overwhelmed by grief, which the author refers to as “the window between the pain and love.” She was motivated to write her book after the 2015 death of her husband of 10 years, David Bigby, and that tragedy infuses the book’s hard-won wisdom. Her recollections of David’s final days and moments are genuinely moving, and she effectively links her life with her partner to the lessons that she conveys throughout the book. These lessons—about never giving up and accepting that one has hidden strength—are written in a simple, readable style that feels more like a conversation with a friend than a coping manual. Indeed, the author’s intimate, confessional tone is the book’s greatest strength. However, several of Ho’s observations rely on clichés. “We should be grateful for each day we have,” she writes at one such point, “for we will never know what will happen to us tomorrow.” At another point, she notes that “we should live our lives as if it were our last day on Earth. Enjoy and live for the present.” Still, the book is undeniably well designed; each chapter begins and ends with motivational statements and questions that help bring her sentiments into sharper focus. She also consistently reassures her readers that they’ll be strong enough to make it through this dark period in their lives, and many will find this valuable.

A calming, empathetic talk about finding happiness after intense grief.