LIVING IN SYNC: Men and Women in Love by Lois Leiderman & Joel Robert Davitz Davitz

LIVING IN SYNC: Men and Women in Love

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KIRKUS REVIEW

Being ""out of sync"" is when one partner or both feel that their mate is ""not the person I married."" Why? Because not only do people change over time, but their notion of an ""ideal mate"" changes accordingly. Through a study of 400 people, and interviews with a select sample, the Davitzes proceed to make their point, that there is general similarity in these changes of couples' perceptions. Among the major agreements within age groups are: in their 20s, men are predominantly interested in sex, women in romance with a perfect man. In the 30s (the ""status decade""), men want women to have a substantial career of their own, to add to the household income; whereas a woman seeks a family man, good with children, and sensitive to home-life issues, etc.""The key to living 'in sync' is the mutual awareness and satisfaction of each other's needs."" This guiding principle is obvious, but the authors' contribution is along the lines of cognitive therapy--people don't understand their mates' desires, but if they did, it would help resolve many marital difficulties. To this end the book includes a self-scoring test to see where you and your mate are in or out of sync with each other's expectations. Common-sense advice, useful to some.

Pub Date: Aug. 20th, 1986
Publisher: Bergh--dist. by Dutton