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INTIMATE WORLDS

LIFE INSIDE THE FAMILY

A big book on families in Americadysfunctional and otherwiseby the always sympathetic Scarf (Intimate Partners, 1987, etc.), who has done her homework and more. Psychotherapy, psychoanalysis, developmental theory, and ethology are among the schools of interpersonal behavior brought to bear on this searching analysis of the structure and function of families. They form part of the framework for a taxonomy, the ``Beavers Systems Model'' (after psychologist W. Robert Beavers), that arrays families across a five-level continuum from ``Severely Disturbed'' (level 5) through ``Borderline,'' ``Midrange,'' ``Adequate,'' and ``Optimal'' (level 1). The key determinants on where a particular family fits have to do with how issues of intimacy, power, and conflict are handled. There's no question that as a scholar/writer/interviewer, Scarf is one of the best. Much of the book is verbatim dialogue and interpretation of four families, illustrating levels 5 though 2. We meet, for instance, the ``Borderline'' very well off Maguires, dominated by Dad the dictator, with a daughter who gains autonomy through bulimia; and the rule-bound ``Midrange'' Giffords, who project their problems of intimacy into arguments about disciplining their little daughter. The four families come alive in multiple interviews that start out with family ``genograms,'' which often reveal startling similarities in the family backgrounds of the parents and a repetition of patterns of behavior across generations. Amplifying the interviews is text describing research and theories on early infancy. An interesting chapter raises the question of what determines resilience in individuals whose childhood backgrounds would predict disaster. Certainly not book a book that has all the answers; it ignores, for example, the influence of peers and role models outside the family. Nevertheless, we are treated to a wonderfully absorbing journey into the lives of some memorable familiesguided by an expert who is not above putting her own family in the Beavers spectrum. (line drawings, not seen) (Author tour)

Pub Date: Oct. 1, 1995

ISBN: 0-394-56543-6

Page Count: 464

Publisher: Random House

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Aug. 15, 1995

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MASTERY

Readers unfamiliar with the anecdotal material Greene presents may find interesting avenues to pursue, but they should...

Greene (The 33 Strategies of War, 2007, etc.) believes that genius can be learned if we pay attention and reject social conformity.

The author suggests that our emergence as a species with stereoscopic, frontal vision and sophisticated hand-eye coordination gave us an advantage over earlier humans and primates because it allowed us to contemplate a situation and ponder alternatives for action. This, along with the advantages conferred by mirror neurons, which allow us to intuit what others may be thinking, contributed to our ability to learn, pass on inventions to future generations and improve our problem-solving ability. Throughout most of human history, we were hunter-gatherers, and our brains are engineered accordingly. The author has a jaundiced view of our modern technological society, which, he writes, encourages quick, rash judgments. We fail to spend the time needed to develop thorough mastery of a subject. Greene writes that every human is “born unique,” with specific potential that we can develop if we listen to our inner voice. He offers many interesting but tendentious examples to illustrate his theory, including Einstein, Darwin, Mozart and Temple Grandin. In the case of Darwin, Greene ignores the formative intellectual influences that shaped his thought, including the discovery of geological evolution with which he was familiar before his famous voyage. The author uses Grandin's struggle to overcome autistic social handicaps as a model for the necessity for everyone to create a deceptive social mask.

Readers unfamiliar with the anecdotal material Greene presents may find interesting avenues to pursue, but they should beware of the author's quirky, sometimes misleading brush-stroke characterizations.

Pub Date: Nov. 13, 2012

ISBN: 978-0-670-02496-4

Page Count: 320

Publisher: Viking

Review Posted Online: Sept. 12, 2012

Kirkus Reviews Issue: Oct. 1, 2012

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THE 48 LAWS OF POWER

If the authors are serious, this is a silly, distasteful book. If they are not, it’s a brilliant satire.

The authors have created a sort of anti-Book of Virtues in this encyclopedic compendium of the ways and means of power.

Everyone wants power and everyone is in a constant duplicitous game to gain more power at the expense of others, according to Greene, a screenwriter and former editor at Esquire (Elffers, a book packager, designed the volume, with its attractive marginalia). We live today as courtiers once did in royal courts: we must appear civil while attempting to crush all those around us. This power game can be played well or poorly, and in these 48 laws culled from the history and wisdom of the world’s greatest power players are the rules that must be followed to win. These laws boil down to being as ruthless, selfish, manipulative, and deceitful as possible. Each law, however, gets its own chapter: “Conceal Your Intentions,” “Always Say Less Than Necessary,” “Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy,” and so on. Each chapter is conveniently broken down into sections on what happened to those who transgressed or observed the particular law, the key elements in this law, and ways to defensively reverse this law when it’s used against you. Quotations in the margins amplify the lesson being taught. While compelling in the way an auto accident might be, the book is simply nonsense. Rules often contradict each other. We are told, for instance, to “be conspicuous at all cost,” then told to “behave like others.” More seriously, Greene never really defines “power,” and he merely asserts, rather than offers evidence for, the Hobbesian world of all against all in which he insists we live. The world may be like this at times, but often it isn’t. To ask why this is so would be a far more useful project.

If the authors are serious, this is a silly, distasteful book. If they are not, it’s a brilliant satire.

Pub Date: Sept. 1, 1998

ISBN: 0-670-88146-5

Page Count: 430

Publisher: Viking

Review Posted Online: May 19, 2010

Kirkus Reviews Issue: July 15, 1998

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