HOW GREEN WAS MY APPLE

More paper-thin foolishness in the company of inept, super-tall British agent Apple-ton Porter--who is only allowed into the field when the spymasters want the job at hand to be bungled. (Unlike Lovell's weary readers, ""Apple"" never seems to catch on to this formula.) This time the mission is the shadowing of Russian Embassy custodian Alexander Grishin--who, Apple is told, has been acting in a suspicious manner. So, along with beautiful new colleague Kate, Apple dons silly disguises, follows Grishin to bars and brothels (sampling the stock at both places), wrestles with some KGB agents. . . but eventually is told that Grishin is really USSR super-spy ""Colonel Moscow."" (Apple's clumsy spying was supposed to encourage the Colonel to leave town.) And meanwhile, to fill out this uncommonly paltry plot, Loveil adds a cutesy subplot about the theft of Apple's beloved automobile by a ""car-napping"" ring. Juvenile spy-comedy, limper with every excursion.