SURVIVAL OF THE THICKEST

A debut collection of essays from an actor and comedian.

In these unabashed, often bawdy sketches, Buteau, perhaps best known for her role on First Wives Club, explores love, womanhood, work, and other topics. Recounting her New Jersey girlhood, the author writes about how her “Jamaican and Haitian” background fueled curiosity, and her "strict immigrant parents" inspired resilience. She also chronicles dating disasters; finding comedy in the wake of 9/11; meeting and marrying her Dutch husband; and braving in vitro fertilization treatments that concluded in surrogacy and twins. Throughout, Buteau conveys a variety of life lessons with mixed success. Some essays turn glib: An exploration of college friendship stumbles into a final truth about valuing acceptance, and a list of “Advice You Can Fit on a Magnet” yields more familiar affirmations than wisdom ("You are worthy. You are perfect. You're amazing. Rinse and repeat"). The author peppers the narrative with frequent slang—e.g., "bish"—and abundant profanity, and she often eschews richer description in favor of fleeting pop culture. Fresher essays vault from breathless humor to thoughtful musing. Buteau's knack for steering absurd situations toward warm insight shines when she describes how a one-time gig emceeing for a male revue led to admiration for a stripper's work ethic; or how losing a tooth while biting a bagel somehow brought her closer to her husband's family. The author’s memories about her father brim with fond respect, and her discussions of being busty, curvy, and light-skinned abound with self-empowerment. The real standout essays focus on marriage and motherhood. At turns joyful and sweet about her marriage's early days and heartbreaking about miscarriages, Buteau is reassuring in her candor. Ultimately, this exuberant pastiche from the "sassy tell-it-like-it-is neighbor" is uneven but sometimes genuinely funny.

A book for fans of blue humor punctuated with moments of tenderness and wit.