A reader-friendly book that breaks down useful parenting strategies into manageable steps.
A debut self-help book focuses on a parent’s self-awareness as a key factor in overcoming challenges.
The author—a clinical and public health nurse and experienced parent—expertly lays out the essence of her guide up front, telling readers what they should expect when perusing it. She uses the metaphor of an improvisational dance for the parent-child relationship—something that ebbs and flows and requires self-awareness and practice. Solovieff employs a mnemonic for what she refers to as each parent’s L.O.V.E. capacities: Listening, OM Moments (calming oneself), Visualizing and Voicing, and Exploring, which often overlap and inform one another. The first part of the manual explores “commonly held ideas and feelings that become pitfalls in parenting,” while the second section describes the L.O.V.E. elements in detail. The author’s inclusion of lists about each one, namely what happens when readers don’t develop a capacity as well as when they do, serves as a practical framework as well as a motivational tool for learning and practicing. While Solovieff has an encouraging, reassuring voice, she does not suggest that there are easy fixes: “I would say a mistake we parents make is thinking we’ll go through our practices once, respond to our children once, and once-and-for-all things will change. In reality, we have to re-visit our L.O.V.E. practices frequently. And respond to our children about whatever the challenge is, repeatedly.” The book is supportive of this ongoing need because it features a multitude of worthy exercises. For example, the chapter on Exploring includes “Uncluttering Your Decision Making Space,” which moves readers through steps for identifying and then “erasing” items that cause anger or fear. Valuable tables at the start help readers remember the capacities and gauge their skills before and after putting them into practice.
A reader-friendly book that breaks down useful parenting strategies into manageable steps.Pub Date: April 25, 2017
ISBN: 978-1-5043-7435-4
Page Count: 146
Publisher: Balboa
Review Posted Online: Oct. 18, 2017
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Dec. 15, 2017
Review Program: Kirkus Indie
A vivid sequel that strains credulity.
Fremont (After Long Silence, 1999) continues—and alters—her story of how memories of the Holocaust affected her family.
At the age of 44, the author learned that her father had disowned her, declaring her “predeceased”—or dead in his eyes—in his will. It was his final insult: Her parents had stopped speaking to her after she’d published After Long Silence, which exposed them as Jewish Holocaust survivors who had posed as Catholics in Europe and America in order to hide multilayered secrets. Here, Fremont delves further into her tortured family dynamics and shows how the rift developed. One thread centers on her life after her harrowing childhood: her education at Wellesley and Boston University, the loss of her virginity to a college boyfriend before accepting her lesbianism, her stint with the Peace Corps in Lesotho, and her decades of work as a lawyer in Boston. Another strand involves her fraught relationship with her sister, Lara, and how their difficulties relate to their father, a doctor embittered after years in the Siberian gulag; and their mother, deeply enmeshed with her own sister, Zosia, who had married an Italian count and stayed in Rome to raise a child. Fremont tells these stories with novelistic flair, ending with a surprising theory about why her parents hid their Judaism. Yet she often appears insensitive to the serious problems she says Lara once faced, including suicidal depression. “The whole point of suicide, I thought, was to succeed at it,” she writes. “My sister’s completion rate was pathetic.” Key facts also differ from those in her earlier work. After Long Silence says, for example, that the author grew up “in a small city in the Midwest” while she writes here that she grew up in “upstate New York,” changes Fremont says she made for “consistency” in the new book but that muddy its narrative waters. The discrepancies may not bother readers seeking psychological insights rather than factual accuracy, but others will wonder if this book should have been labeled a fictionalized autobiography rather than a memoir.
A vivid sequel that strains credulity.Pub Date: Feb. 11, 2020
ISBN: 978-1-982113-60-5
Page Count: 352
Publisher: Gallery Books/Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: Oct. 20, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Nov. 15, 2019
BOOK REVIEW
A straightforward tale of kindness and paying it forward in 1980s New York.
When advertising executive Schroff answered a child’s request for spare change by inviting him for lunch, she did not expect the encounter to grow into a friendship that would endure into his adulthood. The author recounts how she and Maurice, a promising boy from a drug-addicted family, learned to trust each other. Schroff acknowledges risks—including the possibility of her actions being misconstrued and the tension of crossing socio-economic divides—but does not dwell on the complexities of homelessness or the philosophical problems of altruism. She does not question whether public recognition is beneficial, or whether it is sufficient for the recipient to realize the extent of what has been done. With the assistance of People human-interest writer Tresniowski (Tiger Virtues, 2005, etc.), Schroff adheres to a personal narrative that traces her troubled relationship with her father, her meetings with Maurice and his background, all while avoiding direct parallels, noting that their childhoods differed in severity even if they shared similar emotional voids. With feel-good dramatizations, the story seldom transcends the message that reaching out makes a difference. It is framed in simple terms, from attributing the first meeting to “two people with complicated pasts and fragile dreams” that were “somehow meant to be friends” to the conclusion that love is a driving force. Admirably, Schroff notes that she did not seek a role as a “substitute parent,” and she does not judge Maurice’s mother for her lifestyle. That both main figures experience a few setbacks yet eventually survive is never in question; the story fittingly concludes with an epilogue by Maurice. For readers seeking an uplifting reminder that small gestures matter.
Pub Date: Nov. 1, 2011
ISBN: 978-1-4516-4251-3
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Howard Books/Simon & Schuster
Review Posted Online: July 26, 2011
Kirkus Reviews Issue: Sept. 1, 2011
BOOK REVIEW
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