You say you (or a loved one) have lupus? glaucoma? You say you're flying with your husband in his private plane, and he drops dead at the controls, and the radio isn't working, and you haven't the faintest idea what to do? Well, friend, what you need--obviously--is a miracle; and the gentle-voiced, unctuous host of the Christian Broadcasting Network's 700 Club is here to tell you you can get one. All the aforementioned desperate cases worked out fine (the lady made a beautiful crash-landing), and Robertson has a thick dossier of even more spectacular instances to prove that God can intervene dramatically in your life, no matter what the medical odds or laws of nature seem to say. Robertson himself, with the help of some devout staff-members, prayed away a hurricane that was threatening the 400-foot CBN tower in Virginia Beach. Les Lemke (seen most recently on 60 Minutes) became a remarkable pianist overnight, even though he is blind, retarded, and never had a music lesson. (A miracle, says Robertson; an idiot savant, say psychologists.) And there's even a man named Don Dalbosco from Grimes County, Texas, who finds oil ""by visions and the word of knowledge"" from God. Robertson suggests various step-by-step procedures for harnessing this divine energy, but they all involve prayer, Bible-reading, ""rebuking Satan,"" getting other people to pray and pull for you, and giving money to a church or Christian organization like, say, the 700 Club. Robertson is not over-confident. He hedges that God ""normally gives to those that persevere,"" and he admits that 440,000 cancer patients will have to meet their maker this year while a handful of stricken believers get a new lease on life. Sweet, sanctimonious snake oil.