GUT PUNCH

Entrepreneur Pennington reflects on taking care of his wife following her cancer diagnosis in this memoir.

The brief book offers a quintessential love story, in which two college sweethearts at Washington State University—a cheerleader and a would-be lawyer—embarked on a happy marriage right out of college, punctuated by sleep-deprived study sessions and the early chaos of parenting. The memoir then jumps ahead to decades later; Pennington and his wife, Wendi, now both grandparents in their mid-50s, were still deeply in love. Then, suddenly, came the titular “gut punch,” the author writes, adding that it wasn’t “one clean blow. Rather, it would come in parts.” The first part was Wendi’s diagnosis of breast cancer in March 2021—a medical emergency that quickly upended her and her family’s sense of normalcy. Many chapters weave stories of Wendi’s medical journey, which included visits to the Mayo Clinic and chemotherapy infusions, with accounts of the author’s emerging role as a full-time caregiver. Pennington writes, for instance, of new nighttime rituals that included walking laps in the house with an eye toward Wendi’s bedroom as he scanned “for any shiver of movement that might require action.” The author relates his story in a vulnerable style that emphasizes the toll that caregiving can take on family members by noting his own battles with loneliness, depression, and, later, a form of PTSD known as dissociative amnesia: “As caregivers, we absorb everything. Then we forget,” he writes. This concise volume will be particularly valuable to readers in similar circumstances, as it not only offers an insider’s look at the life of a caregiver, but also provides practical advice. These tips range from the practical (such as keeping meticulous written records and asking doctors every question twice) to the psychological (“You’re not being strong by staying silent”). The book’s moments of raw emotion are punctuated by poignant insights that offer sage words of wisdom, as when he reflects on the symbolism of Wendi’s crooked wig.

A powerful recollection of a caregiver’s experiences that balances advice with reflection.