DUEY'S TALE

This is one of those unfortunate undertakings that would never embarrass their authors by appearing in print were they not written by celebrities. Duey is a baby seed, stirring with the others in his mother's leafy skirt until the wind blows him away -- and down the river with a jive-talking log named Gabby and Slicker, a motherly bottle. They are parted, but Duey later runs across Gabby, now an elegantly carved walking stick (""Man oh man oh man, let me tell you about my operation""), and Slicker, displayed in a sailmaker's shop window, and eventually settles down himself as a fine young tree, happy to be noticed by a young couple who sit at his feet. Absolutely nothing happens and though Duey sees ""different sights"" none are described; the story really evaporates before it begins.