JOURNEY THROUGH ALZHEIMER'S

In this memoir, a psychologist recalls his 50-year marriage, particularly the difficult final years of his wife’s life, during which they navigated her heartbreaking struggle with Alzheimer’s disease.

Gardner met his wife, Betty Ann, in 1966 when they were studying for graduate degrees at the University of Nevada, Reno. He was working toward his Ph.D. in experimental psychology and she was pursuing a master’s in clinical psychology. They married in 1967 and, two years later, moved to Pueblo, Colorado, where the author accepted a position as an assistant professor at the local college. Next came two children; life was good. In 1992, at age 50, Betty Ann applied to the Denver University law school and graduated in 1996, placing in the top 17th percentile of her class. “No indication,” Gardner writes, “of the cognitive problems that lay ahead.” The statement reflects a question he asks himself throughout this retrospective: At what point could he have identified the first symptoms of a disease that spends decades silently taking down its victim? Early indications are easily dismissed as brief moments of confusion. Perhaps the first sign, he writes, came in 2008, when, on a car ride through the mountains, Betty Ann commented: “At least there are not any dead bodies hanging from the cliffs.” The tentative Alzheimer’s diagnosis came in 2014, when she was almost 71. He continued to care for her at home until 2016. Gardner guides readers through a comprehensive explanation of the physiology of dementia. He also offers encouragement to those experiencing minor cognitive slowdowns associated with aging—mere irritations rather than alarm bells. And he includes a wealth of useful advice for caretaker spouses and families. When the author speaks about his wife, he repeatedly refers to her by name. Near the end of the memoir, he gives readers a poignant clue to this narrative quirk: “One observation I make is that after Betty Ann’s death no one ever mentions her name. How I long for people to share their memories of Betty Ann with me. Funny stories, sad stories, or little anecdotes. Just mention her name to me occasionally. It informs me that she remains in their memories.”

A touching, painfully sad account; delivers valuable information and emotional support for fellow travelers.