Roald Dahl's first full-length adult fiction is immaculately phrased, crisply turned, and terribly disappointing. What one anticipates above all with Dahl (Kiss Kiss) is an inventive notion, and the farce notion here is one that's been diddled around with in dozens of books and stories already: collecting sperm from famous men and freezing it for future sale re artificial insemination. DaM's version is the 1938 diary of Oswald Hendryks Cornelius—his memories at age 43 of his escapades some 25 years earlier. English youth Oswald makes his first fortune at 17 by journeying to the Sudan, purchasing a chunk of the world's most potent aphrodisiac (ground-up Blister Beetles), and selling it in pill form to the wealthiest men (and then women too) of Paris. But Oswald returns to England determined to strike it even richer. Enter A. R. Woresley, Oswald's chemistry tutor at Cambridge—who's doing research in sperm preservation, extracting semen from prize bulls—and, after Oswald has helped out with the sticky mechanics of bull-semen-snatching, he naturally gets the idea to transfer the technique to humans. Needed (once reluctant Woresley agrees to cooperate): a resourceful female confederate. They find such a woman in Yasmin Howcomely ("She was absolutely soaked in sex"), and soon the trio has its game plan: Yasmin will slip each famous man the super-aphrodisiac, greet the expected response with a condom, and collect an authenticating signature before hurrying off with the "stuff. . . in the bag," ready for Woresley's freeze-dry process. Among Yasmin's conquests: dear old Renoir; randy young Picasso (too fast a mover, alas, to pause for prophylaxis); homosexual Proust (Yasmin dresses as a boy and simulates buggery—"I could have shoved it in a jar of pickled onions and he wouldn't have known the difference"); D. H. Lawrence (sterile); Puccini ("stupendous"); Einstein ("all brains and no body"); and G. B. Shaw (a 63-year-old virgin). Along the way, there's elaborate sexual slapstick with just the right balance of elegance and bawdiness—but somehow it's never really funny, and the single basic joke is repeated with variations that don't really develop or progress. Mildly entertaining ribaldry, then, dotted with famous men in heat—a classy enough Rabelaisian diversion, but not the grabber of a novel that Dahl's fans might have hoped for.
Pub Date: April 11, 1980
ISBN: 0140055770
Page Count: 212
Publisher: Knopf
Review Posted Online: Oct. 16, 2011
Kirkus Reviews Issue: April 1, 1980
Characters flip between bottomless self-regard and pitiless self-loathing while, as late as the second-to-last chapter, yet...
Four Chicago sisters anchor a sharp, sly family story of feminine guile and guilt.
Newcomer Lombardo brews all seven deadly sins into a fun and brimming tale of an unapologetically bougie couple and their unruly daughters. In the opening scene, Liza Sorenson, daughter No. 3, flirts with a groomsman at her sister’s wedding. “There’s four of you?” he asked. “What’s that like?” Her retort: “It’s a vast hormonal hellscape. A marathon of instability and hair products.” Thus begins a story bristling with a particular kind of female intel. When Wendy, the oldest, sets her sights on a mate, she “made sure she left her mark throughout his house—soy milk in the fridge, box of tampons under the sink, surreptitious spritzes of her Bulgari musk on the sheets.” Turbulent Wendy is the novel’s best character, exuding a delectable bratty-ness. The parents—Marilyn, all pluck and busy optimism, and David, a genial family doctor—strike their offspring as impossibly happy. Lombardo levels this vision by interspersing chapters of the Sorenson parents’ early lean times with chapters about their daughters’ wobbly forays into adulthood. The central story unfurls over a single event-choked year, begun by Wendy, who unlatches a closed adoption and springs on her family the boy her stuffy married sister, Violet, gave away 15 years earlier. (The sisters improbably kept David and Marilyn clueless with a phony study-abroad scheme.) Into this churn, Lombardo adds cancer, infidelity, a heart attack, another unplanned pregnancy, a stillbirth, and an office crush for David. Meanwhile, youngest daughter Grace perpetrates a whopper, and “every day the lie was growing like mold, furring her judgment.” The writing here is silky, if occasionally overwrought. Still, the deft touches—a neighborhood fundraiser for a Little Free Library, a Twilight character as erotic touchstone—delight. The class calibrations are divine even as the utter apolitical whiteness of the Sorenson world becomes hard to fathom.
Characters flip between bottomless self-regard and pitiless self-loathing while, as late as the second-to-last chapter, yet another pleasurable tendril of sisterly malice uncurls.Pub Date: June 25, 2019
ISBN: 978-0-385-54425-2
Page Count: 544
Publisher: Doubleday
Review Posted Online: March 3, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 15, 2019
SEEN & HEARD
Absolutely enthralling. Read it.
A young Irish couple gets together, splits up, gets together, splits up—sorry, can't tell you how it ends!
Irish writer Rooney has made a trans-Atlantic splash since publishing her first novel, Conversations With Friends, in 2017. Her second has already won the Costa Novel Award, among other honors, since it was published in Ireland and Britain last year. In outline it's a simple story, but Rooney tells it with bravura intelligence, wit, and delicacy. Connell Waldron and Marianne Sheridan are classmates in the small Irish town of Carricklea, where his mother works for her family as a cleaner. It's 2011, after the financial crisis, which hovers around the edges of the book like a ghost. Connell is popular in school, good at soccer, and nice; Marianne is strange and friendless. They're the smartest kids in their class, and they forge an intimacy when Connell picks his mother up from Marianne's house. Soon they're having sex, but Connell doesn't want anyone to know and Marianne doesn't mind; either she really doesn't care, or it's all she thinks she deserves. Or both. Though one time when she's forced into a social situation with some of their classmates, she briefly fantasizes about what would happen if she revealed their connection: "How much terrifying and bewildering status would accrue to her in this one moment, how destabilising it would be, how destructive." When they both move to Dublin for Trinity College, their positions are swapped: Marianne now seems electric and in-demand while Connell feels adrift in this unfamiliar environment. Rooney's genius lies in her ability to track her characters' subtle shifts in power, both within themselves and in relation to each other, and the ways they do and don't know each other; they both feel most like themselves when they're together, but they still have disastrous failures of communication. "Sorry about last night," Marianne says to Connell in February 2012. Then Rooney elaborates: "She tries to pronounce this in a way that communicates several things: apology, painful embarrassment, some additional pained embarrassment that serves to ironise and dilute the painful kind, a sense that she knows she will be forgiven or is already, a desire not to 'make a big deal.' " Then: "Forget about it, he says." Rooney precisely articulates everything that's going on below the surface; there's humor and insight here as well as the pleasure of getting to know two prickly, complicated people as they try to figure out who they are and who they want to become.
Absolutely enthralling. Read it.Pub Date: April 16, 2019
ISBN: 978-1-984-82217-8
Page Count: 288
Publisher: Hogarth
Review Posted Online: Feb. 17, 2019
Kirkus Reviews Issue: March 1, 2019
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