SEVEN EXITS

Bakari offers a motivational self-help guide to empowerment.

The author, an “Empowerment Partner” and nonprofit founder, presents her Seven Exits approach, which is based on her theory that people know where they want to go but don’t know how to leave where they are. (“You must exit spaces that disempower you,” she insists.) The first exit, “Hyper Defenses,” involves examining the “hyper-ego” (the “big, bossy part of your inner self”) and letting go of its defenses to fully process feelings. In the second exit, “Silence and Secrecy,” Bakari explores the “heavy cognitive load” of secret-keeping, which can impair mental clarity, decision making, and psychological well-being. (Uncovering and addressing trauma is key for improving both mental health and relationships, the author asserts.) The third exit, “Emotional Dependency,” requires becoming “‘self’ centered” and cultivating knowledge, compassion, discipline, regulation, and confidence in oneself. Exit four, “Stagnant Relationships,” suggests identifying connections where there is insufficient growth, connection, and mutual satisfaction. (Bakari also discusses how to negotiate needs in relationships.) “Complacency,” the fifth exit, advises readers to give up beliefs and habits that keep people stuck. The sixth exit, “Indoctrination,” urges readers out of passivity and into living a principled life. The final exit, “Purpose and Passion,” is a call to embrace the present moment and accept uncertainty. Bakari’s unique framework will resonate with high-functioning readers who feel internally discontented. She effectively merges psychological concepts with lived experiences and approaches well-being holistically. Readers will appreciate Bakari’s tough-love approach and hard truths like, “When someone feels bullied, they often leave the relationship if they can. If they can’t, they may withdraw emotionally or engage in passive-aggressive behavior to reclaim their sense of power.” Her layered unpacking of defense mechanisms will help readers become more self-aware. However, some of the author’s observations (“for at least 75% of clients, exploring their relationship with their mother is essential to their transformation”) and the use of celebrity suicides to illustrate the assertion that success doesn’t equal happiness seem reductive.

An inspirational empowerment roadmap that could benefit from a more rigorous approach.