MURDER YOUR EMPLOYER

A new novel from the man who wrote Swing (2005), Where the Truth Lies (2003), and “Escape (The Piña Colada Song).”

When Cliff Iverson tries—and fails—to murder his toxic boss, he is apprehended almost instantly. But instead of taking him down to the station, the “cops” who catch him whisk him away to the McMasters Conservatory for the Applied Arts. Set in a secret location, this very exclusive institution boasts a bucolic campus, three (unpublished) Michelin stars, and a comprehensive education in assassination. Cliff is there as a scholarship student, and much of the novel is addressed to the benefactor who made it possible for him to become a more effective murderer. There are also entries written by faculty and administrators as well as scenes following the educations of Dulcie Mown and Gemma Lindley, two other students. Once Cliff, Dulcie, and Gemma graduate, we follow them into the world as they scheme to complete their thesis projects—that is, as they attempt to “delete” their targets. There are a lot of genres happening at once in this novel. The debt to British boarding school stories is obvious, although the vibe is very different when the students aren’t adolescents finding themselves and their places in the world but, rather, full-grown adults playing water polo and enjoying sumptuous meals as they learn best practices for taking lives without getting caught. The journeys of Cliff, Dulcie, and Gemma unfold like mysteries in reverse. And, while the story is set in the 1950s, the plot and dialogue are much indebted to the screwball comedies of the 1930s. If this sounds like a lot, that’s because it is a lot. Everything about this book is a lot—if not too much. Holmes asks readers to suspend disbelief from the get-go, and he just keeps asking for more blind credulity as the narrative advances. Maybe more significantly, Holmes seems incapable of passing up an opportunity to be cute or clever. There are so many puns. This tendency slows the narrative in a way that almost invites readers to look for plot holes, of which there are many.

Fun for readers who think that murder is cute.