PREPARING FOR PARENTHOOD

A couples’ and parents’ therapist offers a practical workbook for couples seeking to become parents.

In an introduction, Dueger, a therapist and mother of two, explains that her book is intended to “help couples discover their way as parents by consciously thinking and talking about their hopes and expectations for their family” before having kids. This slender volume contains the kinds of conversations that she says that she wishes she and her husband had before their first daughter was born. The book, which is divided into 17 sections, begins with a couple’s relationship, then tackles the process of preparation for having kids, and finishes with “the early postpartum experience.” Topics addressed include “Communication,” “Intimacy,” “Finances,” the “Roles” of each partner, “Self-Care,” and others. Each short chapter contains specific questions to initiate dialogue between couples both before and after the birth of the child. Overall, this is less of a personal narrative than it is a workbook, but it’s one that’s written in a straightforward, conversational manner that effectively engages the reader. The amount of text on each page is often minimal, but it’s dense with useful considerations that one can easily put into practice; action items in the book may, for example, invite readers to “write down how you communicate with your partner under stress or during a conflict” or to investigate “what expenses will be covered for your child on your current [health care] plan, from pregnancy through childbirth and onward.” In addition, there are numerous sections arranged as grids and lists for future reference, with questions such as “Write down the values you hope to raise your child with and number them in order of importance.”

A resource-filled primer that will help couples prepare for the emotional and pragmatic aspects of child care.