THE HOUSEWIFE AND THE ASSASSIN

A puff pastry about a buttercup housewife who jogs for her liberation, is targeted for assassination, and wins over her pursuer to life and love. Augusta, mother of two girls, wife of fatuous Duke, and a victim of agoraphobia, decides to write an International Jogging Book. On the way to research in California, she meets easy-going Daniel, an old acquaintance and a merchant seaman, who proves to be a jolly tar in bed. However, predatory businesswoman Evalyn, who has discovered that Daniel is the only man who can give her orgasms, arranges to have rival Augusta removed: she hires a cold professional assassin, Ephraim, who's only a hired killer 'cause he never had any family affection. Augusta, meanwhile, is learning that sex is great fun, that Duke is a pill, and that jogging is freeing. But as these revelations unfold, Ephraim (somewhat nicer now because of aikido awareness training) is tracking her down and toting his equalizer. Finally, after a few disquieting face-to-face meetings, he just wounds Augusta, and, weeping, he carries her to the hospital. Eventually the two will find each other's now-elevated level. Augusta is dippy, everyone else is a simple doodle, and the whole thing is floppy.