NEGOTIATING AT HOME

Advice for balancing the juggling act of collaborative parenting.

On any given day, parents face countless moments when they must negotiate with their children. These can include a vast array of choices and determinations: what to eat, when to go to bed, amount of screen time, getting a ride to a friend’s house. Seeking to help readers avoid standoffs, Kurtzberg and Kern, both professors of management, offer numerous ways in which parents can apply workplace skills to the home setting. Although many of the practices they recommend are straightforward and “commonsense,” it is helpful to have reminders of how to use these skills gathered in one place. “Even if we have a sense of the right path forward,” write the authors, “understanding more about why and how certain tactics and techniques work can allow us to make better choices about which tools to use when….We do forget a lot of what we learn.” Kurtzberg and Kern interweave research from a variety of disciplines, including “leadership, psychology, education…[and] communications,” highlighting respectful and fair concepts to assist parents in understanding the interactions between their ideas and those of their children. Though often appropriate, “the ‘because I said so’ logic” is not applicable to all situations. The authors use multiple scenarios (“Stories From Home”) to illustrate their techniques, and they summarize key points at the end of each chapter, making it easy for readers to find the relevant information quickly. For parents who feel overwhelmed, this book offers a concise presentation of successful cooperation tactics. The authors also provide an appendix to help children develop their own negotiation skills. The second and third rules are especially pertinent in today’s society: “Before you even open your mouth, spend a minute thinking,” and “Ask a lot of questions (before your start talking about your own ideas).”

Easily assimilated, useful guidance for parents seeking to create a more harmonious home environment.