AND YOU WILL CALL IT FATE

A man must face a painful reckoning with his mentor in Hillegonds’ memoir.

This is the true story of the author’s relationship with Sean Dempsey, a man who was Hillegonds’ mentor, father figure, role model, and savior—but who could also be abusive to everyone around him. In the book, Hillegonds meets Dempsey while working as a waiter in a Chicago restaurant. Dempsey, a regular, takes an interest in the young man and eventually offers him a job at his financial firm. Hillegonds needs a lucky break, as he’s struggling with alcohol and drugs, which have led to many other problems. He has a number of outstanding arrest warrants in Colorado, no high school diploma, and a daughter whom he never gets to see. But Hillegonds is inspired by Dempsey, who’s at home in the frenetic, vibrant world of downtown Chicago business. Dempsey shows Hillegonds the ropes, provides opportunities, and eventually forces Hillegonds to go to rehab, which changes Hillegonds’ life for good. But Dempsey is violent and often cruel, which Hillegonds finds ways to rationalize at the beginning, but once he’s back from rehab, he finds it harder and harder to accept. Eventually, Hillegonds has to rethink his relationship with Dempsey altogether. We see him find meaning in boxing and AA meetings, reunite with his daughter, and go to college, where he discovers that he loves to write. This is a moving, honest, and thoughtful look at mentorship, addiction, and masculinity. Hillegonds is an engaging writer, with both humor and insight to spare. The ending could have developed these insights even further, but that’s a small complaint. The work will surely be noteworthy to those interested in addiction or masculinity in contemporary America.

Candid, lucid, funny—everything a good memoir should be.