The co-author of Letting Go, about her breakups, found the secret of catching Mr. Right in ""an obscure article about the psychology of human communications"" (aimed at making sales)--and ff you follow her Love Plan ""exactly,"" you can't fail. Everyone, it seems, has a dominant ""sense""--sight, sound, or feelings (emotional and tactile, it appears). To get on your particular man's wavelength, ask him a routine question--about, say, a business trip or his home town. The Visual man will tell you about how things looked; the auditory man, about how they sounded; the ""feelings man,"" about how they felt. Then, ""to make him feel you really understand his inner being,"" you talk to him in his particular Love Language. If he's visual, leave erotic magazines around the bedroom; if he's auditory, ""pant gently in his car""; if he's that other sort, ""he'll love whatever you want to do, as long as it feels good."" (More mundanely: ""To the visual man, you could say, 'You tan see how much I love you.' To the auditory man, you might say, '. . . hear how much I love you.'"" Etc.) Since ""the Love Plan calls for you to make yourself appear to be as much like him as possible,"" you might also try physical mirroring (aping a person's posture or gestures), dressing the way he does, and getting in sync with his body rhythms, even his breathing. There is also a special ""anchoring"" technique for turning him on called ""Method Sex."" For magic-formula addicts low in self-respect.